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What Should I Know Before Requesting an Ex Parte Hearing?
Domestic Violence, Restraining Order, Restraining Order

What Should I Know Before Requesting an Ex Parte Hearing?

Family law emergencies don’t always wait for regularly scheduled court dates. When urgent situations threaten your safety, your children’s well-being, or your financial security, California law provides a mechanism for immediate court intervention: the ex parte hearing. The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, led by Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger, has extensive experience handling ex parte matters and can provide swift, strategic representation for urgent situations.

Understanding Ex Parte Hearings in California

An ex parte hearing is an emergency court proceeding requested on shortened notice—sometimes with little or no advance notice to the other party. The term “ex parte” means “from one party,” indicating that these hearings can proceed even if the other side hasn’t had the typical amount of time to prepare a response.

Unlike regular motions that require 16 court days’ notice, ex parte applications can be heard within days or even hours of filing. California courts reserve ex parte hearings for genuine emergencies where waiting for a regular hearing would cause immediate harm or irreparable injury. Judges scrutinize ex parte requests carefully because they deviate from the normal process that gives both parties adequate time to prepare.

Ex parte hearings are not the appropriate venue for routine disputes or matters that have existed for weeks or months without creating immediate danger. Courts expect parties to use regular motion procedures unless circumstances truly qualify as emergencies requiring immediate judicial intervention.

When Ex Parte Relief Is Appropriate

California family courts grant ex parte hearings in specific urgent circumstances, including:

  • Immediate Safety Concerns: When domestic violence, child abuse, threats of harm, or kidnapping risks exist, ex parte hearings allow victims to obtain immediate protective orders, modify custody arrangements, or secure other safety measures without delay. These situations represent the clearest justification for emergency relief.
  • Child Custody Emergencies: Beyond safety threats, ex parte custody relief may be appropriate when a parent violates existing custody orders by refusing to return a child, when a parent plans to leave the jurisdiction with the child without permission, or when a child faces immediate risk of harm in their current placement.
  • Financial Emergencies: Ex parte financial relief addresses situations like a spouse draining bank accounts, hiding or destroying marital assets, failing to pay court-ordered support, causing imminent eviction or utility shutoff, or refusing to maintain required insurance coverage. The key is demonstrating immediate, irreparable financial harm.
  • Property Protection: When a spouse threatens to sell, transfer, or destroy significant marital property, ex parte orders can prevent these actions until a regular hearing addresses property division properly.

Information and Documentation You Need

Successfully obtaining ex parte relief requires thorough preparation and compelling evidence. Courts won’t grant emergency orders based on general allegations or unsubstantiated claims. You should gather:

Detailed Declaration Under Penalty of Perjury

Your declaration must clearly explain what emergency exists, why you couldn’t address it through regular motion procedures, when you learned of the emergency, what immediate harm will occur without court intervention, and what specific relief you’re requesting. Include specific dates, times, locations, and factual details that demonstrate the urgency.

Supporting Evidence

Gather all available evidence supporting your emergency claim: police reports, medical records, photographs of injuries or property damage, threatening text messages or emails, bank statements showing asset dissipation, witness declarations, and documentation of violated court orders. The more concrete evidence you provide, the stronger your case.

Notice Requirements Documentation

California law requires you to notify the other party of your ex parte request unless doing so would create danger or defeat the emergency relief’s purpose. You must document your efforts to provide notice, including when and how you notified the other party or explain why notice wasn’t possible. Failure to properly handle notice requirements can result in the denial of your request.

Proposed Orders

Prepare clear, specific proposed orders stating exactly what you want the court to order. Vague requests reduce your chances of success. Your proposed orders should be narrowly tailored to address the specific emergency.

Financial Information

For financial emergencies or requests involving support or attorney fees, provide current income and expense declarations, account statements, and documentation of the financial crisis.

Existing Court Orders

Bring copies of all relevant existing court orders, especially if your ex parte request involves alleged violations of those orders.

How the Ex Parte Process Works in California

The ex parte process moves quickly but requires strict compliance with procedural rules. Generally, you must notify the court and the other party by 10:00 a.m. on the court day before your requested hearing date. Some courts have specific ex parte departments or calendars, while others hear ex parte matters at designated times.

At the hearing, you’ll have limited time to present your case—often just minutes. The judge will review your written materials, hear a brief oral argument, and may ask questions. If the other party appears, they’ll have an opportunity to respond. The judge will then decide whether to grant temporary emergency orders.

Ex parte orders are temporary. If the court grants your request, it will typically schedule a follow-up hearing—called an Order to Show Cause hearing—within a few weeks, where both parties can fully argue the issues. The ex parte orders remain in effect until that hearing unless modified.

How Certified Family Law Specialist Judy Burger Can Help

Ex parte proceedings are high-stakes, fast-paced legal matters requiring sophisticated knowledge of family law and courtroom experience. Judy L. Burger’s certification as a Family Law Specialist by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization demonstrates her exceptional expertise in handling complex, urgent family law matters.

This certification, earned by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, requires extensive experience, passing a rigorous examination, ongoing education, and peer recognition. When facing a family law emergency, working with a Certified Specialist provides significant advantages.

Judy Burger and her team understand what constitutes a true emergency warranting ex parte relief versus situations better addressed through regular procedures. She knows how to craft compelling declarations that clearly articulate the emergency, marshal persuasive evidence, comply with technical notice and procedural requirements, and present effective oral arguments in the limited time available.

The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger has successfully obtained ex parte orders protecting clients from domestic violence, preventing child abduction, stopping asset dissipation, and addressing other urgent matters throughout California. Judy’s experience includes representing clients at ex parte hearings and defending against improper ex parte requests.

Beyond obtaining immediate relief, Judy provides strategic guidance for the follow-up proceedings. Ex parte orders are just the first step; you need representation for the subsequent hearings where the court will determine whether to extend, modify, or terminate the emergency orders.

Frequently Asked Questions About Ex Parte Hearings

What happens if my ex parte request is denied?

If the court denies your ex parte request, you can still file a regular motion or Request for Order addressing the same issues through normal procedures. The denial doesn’t prevent you from seeking relief; it simply means the court didn’t find sufficient emergency circumstances to justify shortened notice. Your attorney can help you understand why the request was denied and develop an alternative strategy.

Can I request an ex parte hearing without an attorney?

While you can represent yourself in ex parte proceedings, doing so is risky. Ex parte hearings involve complex procedures, strict deadlines, and high stakes. Mistakes in paperwork, notice, or presentation can result in the denial of your request, potentially leaving you without protection in an emergency. The compressed timeline makes it especially difficult for self-represented parties to prepare effective requests.

How much does an ex parte hearing cost?

Costs vary based on case complexity and attorney fees, but ex parte matters typically require fewer attorney hours than regular motions due to the shortened timeline. Some ex parte requests include asking the court to order the other party to pay your attorney fees, especially in financial emergency situations.

What if the other party violates the ex parte order?

Violating court orders can result in contempt of court findings, fines, jail time, and other sanctions. If the other party violates an ex parte order, document the violations thoroughly and immediately inform your attorney. You may need to file an Order to Show Cause regarding contempt or request additional enforcement measures.

Can an ex parte order be overturned?

Yes. At the follow-up Order to Show Cause hearing, the responding party can present their full case, and the court may modify or terminate the ex parte orders based on complete information from both sides. This is why ex parte orders are temporary—they’re based on limited information presented in an emergency context. The subsequent hearing provides full due process for both parties.

Get Immediate Help for Your Family Law Emergency

When you’re facing a genuine family law emergency requiring immediate court intervention, time is critical. The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger provides experienced, strategic representation for ex parte matters throughout California.

Contact Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger immediately if you need emergency court relief. Our team understands the urgency of these situations and can quickly assess whether ex parte relief is appropriate, prepare compelling documentation, and provide effective representation at your emergency hearing.

Call us now or visit our website—when emergencies arise, every moment counts, and expert legal guidance can make all the difference in protecting you and your family.

child and spousal support
Child Support, Spousal Support

Planning Child and Spousal Support for the New Year

As we enter 2026, California parents and former spouses navigating child and spousal support obligations face important changes that could significantly impact their financial obligations and expectations. Whether you’re paying or receiving support, understanding these updates and planning proactively can help you avoid financial surprises and ensure your support arrangements remain fair and legally compliant.

Key Changes to California Child and Spousal Support Requirements for 2026

At The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, we help clients throughout California navigate the complexities of support modifications and adjustments. As we begin the new year, now is the ideal time to review your current support obligations and plan for any necessary changes.

Minimum Wage Increase Affects Low-Income Adjustment

California’s minimum wage increases from $16.50 to $16.90 per hour on January 1, 2026. This seemingly small change has significant implications for child support calculations, particularly for lower-income parents.

The low-income adjustment applies to obligors whose net disposable income per month is less than the full-time minimum wage in California, and starting September 1, 2024, the threshold is the monthly gross income earned from full-time minimum wage at 40 hours per week, 52 weeks per year. With the 2026 minimum wage increase, this threshold now rises to approximately $2,930 per month in gross income.

This adjustment is crucial because the low-income adjustment reduces the child support amount that would otherwise be determined by the guideline calculators. If you’re a paying parent whose income falls near this threshold, you may now qualify for reduced support obligations. Conversely, if you’re receiving support from a low-income obligor, you may see a decrease in payments.

Updated Child Support Formula

Effective September 1, 2024, California child support orders more accurately reflect the realities of parenting in the 21st century, as the federal government revised the formula used for calculating child support and broadened the income ranges used to qualify parents for low-income adjustments.

The new guidelines create a “low-middle” income bracket that allows family law courts to acknowledge the difficulties faced by working parents earning lower incomes but not on public assistance, enabling courts to set orders more in line with a parent’s current expenses.

Changes to Local Child Support Agency Procedures

From January 1, 2026, local child support agencies have new methods for calculating income and considering earning capacity when actual income is insufficient, with the latest techniques helping ensure that child support orders are based on a realistic assessment of each parent’s financial situation.

Special Needs Trust Provisions

Courts have now been empowered to direct child support payments into special needs trusts for children with disabilities, ensuring that financial support does not jeopardize the child’s eligibility for public assistance programs like Medi-Cal or Supplemental Security Income. This is particularly important for parents of children with disabilities who are planning their 2026 financial arrangements.

Planning Tips for Child and Spousal Support Payors

  • Review Your Income Documentation: If your income has changed significantly since your support order was established, now is the time to gather documentation. Remember, support modifications can only be retroactive to the date you filed your Request for Order with the court, not to when circumstances actually changed, as the court cannot modify support for periods before you formally requested the change.
  • Understand the Low-Income Adjustment: If your net disposable income is close to the minimum wage threshold, calculate whether you now qualify for the low-income adjustment. Even if you earn slightly above minimum wage on a gross basis, you may still qualify based on your net income after taxes and other deductions.
  • Stay Current on Payments: California Family Code section 4722 automatically adds up to 6% annual interest to unpaid support, and this interest compounds yearly. Missing payments can quickly spiral into overwhelming debt. If you’re struggling financially, file for modification immediately rather than simply stopping payment.
  • Consider Tax Implications: The 2026 tax year brings its own considerations. While spousal support remains tax-deductible for the payor and taxable income for the recipient (for orders established before 2019), child support is neither deductible nor taxable. Understanding these distinctions helps with overall financial planning.
  • Document Your Timeshare Accurately: Child support calculations heavily depend on the percentage of time each parent has physical custody. If your actual timeshare differs from what’s in your custody order, this could affect your support obligation. Keep detailed records of actual custody time.

Planning Tips for Child and Spousal Support Recipients

  • Monitor Payment Compliance: Stay on top of whether payments are being made on time and in full. California offers multiple enforcement mechanisms, including wage garnishment, license suspension, and asset seizure. If payments become irregular, contact the local child support agency or your attorney promptly.
  • Understand Modification Limitations: Just as payors can seek modifications when their income decreases, recipients should know that support can also be increased if the payor’s income has risen significantly. Review your former spouse or co-parent’s financial situation annually to determine whether modification is warranted.
  • Plan for Support Termination: California child support orders remain in effect until a minor turns 18, but if your child is still in high school, the order remains in effect until graduation or until your child turns 19, whichever comes first. If your child is approaching this age, begin planning for the financial transition.
  • Know Your Rights Regarding Spousal Support Collection: California Child Support Services can only collect spousal support while collecting current support for a child under 18, and once all children have legally emancipated, California Child Support Services can no longer collect or enforce a spousal support order. If you’re receiving both types of support, plan ahead for how spousal support will be enforced after children emancipate.
  • Keep Detailed Records of Child-Related Expenses: Extraordinary expenses like uninsured medical costs, educational expenses, and childcare can be added to support obligations. Maintain thorough documentation of these costs to support potential modification requests.

How Judy Burger Can Help

Navigating support calculations and modifications requires detailed knowledge of California family law, complex mathematical formulas, and strategic timing. As a California Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy L. Burger possesses the advanced knowledge and proven experience necessary to handle these intricate matters. This certification, held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, demonstrates her commitment to this specialized area of law.

Judy can help you understand how the 2026 changes affect your specific situation. She can calculate whether you qualify for the low-income adjustment, determine if your current support order needs modification, and represent you in seeking fair adjustments based on changed circumstances.

  • For those paying support, Judy can help you file modification requests promptly to avoid losing months of potential relief. She understands the nuances of income calculation, including how to properly account for bonuses, commissions, self-employment income, and other variable compensation sources.
  • For those receiving support, Judy can help ensure you’re receiving the full amount you’re entitled to under California’s guidelines. She can assist with enforcement actions when payments aren’t being made and can seek modifications when the payor’s financial situation has improved.

The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger also handles support issues at the intersection with other family law matters, including custody modifications, divorce proceedings, and domestic violence restraining orders that may affect support calculations.

Child & Spousal Support FAQs

How does the 2026 minimum wage increase affect my child support obligation?

The minimum wage increase to $16.90 per hour raises the threshold for the low-income adjustment to approximately $2,930 per month in gross income. If your net disposable income falls below this amount, you may qualify for a reduced support obligation. Even if you don’t qualify for the adjustment, the change affects the overall calculation formula, so your support amount may change slightly.

Can I modify my support order if I lost my job in late 2025 but didn’t file until 2026?

Yes, you can file for modification, but the modification will only be retroactive to the date you file your Request for Order, not to when you actually lost your job. This is why it’s critical to file immediately when circumstances change—every month of delay represents support you’ll still owe at the higher rate.

If my ex-spouse gets a significant raise, can I request an increase in child support?

Absolutely. A material change in the payor’s income is grounds for modification. You’ll need to demonstrate the income increase and show that it results in a significantly different support calculation under the guidelines. An attorney can help you gather the necessary evidence and file the appropriate motions.

Does spousal support automatically end when my child turns 18?

No, these are separate obligations. However, if the local child support agency has been collecting your spousal support along with child support, they can only continue collecting spousal support while a child under 18 is still receiving support. Once all children emancipate, you’ll need to enforce spousal support through other means, typically with the help of a private attorney.

What happens if I can’t afford to pay both child support and spousal support?

California law doesn’t allow you to simply choose which obligation to pay. Both are court-ordered, and failure to pay either can result in serious consequences, including wage garnishment, license suspension, and contempt charges. Instead, you must file for modification based on changed financial circumstances. The court will then recalculate what you can reasonably afford to pay.

Start 2026 With a Solid Support Plan

Don’t wait until financial problems become overwhelming or until you’ve lost months of potential modification relief. Contact The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger today for a comprehensive review of your support situation. With offices throughout California and a deep understanding of the 2026 changes to support calculations, Judy Burger and her team can provide the strategic guidance you need.

Call now to schedule your consultation. Let us help you navigate the complexities of California support law and create a financial plan that protects your interests and ensures compliance with your legal obligations. The support decisions you make now will impact your finances throughout 2026 and beyond—make sure you’re making them with full knowledge of your rights and options.

Take control of your support obligations this year. Contact The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger and start 2026 with clarity, compliance, and confidence.

How Do I Know It’s Time for a Divorce?
California Divorce

How Do I Know It’s Time for a Divorce?

Deciding whether to end a marriage is one of the most difficult decisions you’ll ever face. There’s no single moment when divorce becomes the obvious answer, and the path to this realization looks different for everyone.

Recognizing the Signs It May Be Time

Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger understands the emotional complexity of this decision and provides compassionate, strategic guidance when you’re considering divorce in California.

Communication Has Completely Broken Down

Healthy marriages involve disagreements, but also productive communication and conflict resolution. When you and your spouse can no longer have civil conversations, when every discussion escalates into an argument, or when you’ve stopped talking altogether, this signals serious relationship deterioration.

If you find yourself avoiding communication entirely, walking on eggshells to prevent conflict, or feeling unheard and dismissed whenever you try to express concerns, these patterns indicate a fundamental communication breakdown. When couples therapy and genuine efforts to improve communication have failed to create lasting change, divorce may be the healthiest option.

Trust Has Been Irreparably Damaged

Trust forms the foundation of marriage. Whether broken through infidelity, financial deception, hidden addictions, or repeated broken promises, shattered trust is extremely difficult to rebuild. While some couples successfully recover from betrayal through counseling and commitment, others find that trust, once broken, cannot be restored.

If you’ve tried to rebuild trust but find yourself constantly suspicious, checking up on your spouse, or unable to believe what they tell you, this ongoing distrust creates a toxic environment. Living in a state of perpetual doubt and anxiety isn’t sustainable and may indicate that the relationship cannot be salvaged.

You’re Staying Only for the Children

Many parents remain in unhappy marriages, believing it’s best for their children. However, research consistently shows that children suffer more from ongoing parental conflict than from divorce itself. If your primary reason for staying married is avoiding the impact on your children, consider whether they’re actually better off witnessing an unhappy, tense, or hostile relationship.

Children learn about relationships by watching their parents. Staying in a loveless or conflict-filled marriage may teach them that this is what relationships should look like. Sometimes divorce, handled thoughtfully with children’s needs prioritized, provides a healthier environment than an intact but dysfunctional household.

Emotional or Physical Abuse Is Present

Any form of abuse—physical violence, emotional manipulation, verbal attacks, financial control, or coercive behavior—is unacceptable and requires immediate action. Abuse typically escalates over time and rarely improves without intensive intervention that the abuser must genuinely commit to.

If you feel afraid of your spouse, if they control your access to money or friends, if they regularly demean or threaten you, or if any physical violence has occurred, your safety and your children’s safety must be the priority. In these situations, consulting with an experienced family law attorney about protective orders and safe exit strategies is crucial.

You’ve Grown Into Different People with Incompatible Goals

People change throughout life, and sometimes spouses grow in different directions. When your fundamental values, life goals, or visions for the future no longer align, and when compromise seems impossible, this incompatibility can make continuing the marriage untenable.

Perhaps one spouse wants children while the other doesn’t, or career ambitions require relocation that the other spouse refuses to consider. Maybe religious beliefs have changed, or lifestyle preferences have diverged dramatically. When core incompatibilities emerge, and neither spouse is willing or able to compromise, divorce may be the path forward.

You’ve Already Emotionally Divorced

Some marriages end long before the legal divorce papers are filed. If you feel emotionally detached from your spouse, if you no longer care about their daily life, if you’ve stopped trying to work on the relationship, or if you’re simply going through the motions while feeling numb or indifferent, you may have already emotionally divorced.

This emotional disconnection often manifests as living parallel lives under the same roof—separate schedules, separate interests, separate friends, and minimal meaningful interaction. When both spouses have checked out emotionally, and neither has interest in reconnecting, staying married often serves no purpose beyond convenience or fear of change.

Repeated Attempts at Reconciliation Have Failed

If you’ve genuinely tried to save your marriage through counseling, communication improvements, changed behaviors, trial separations, or other interventions, but problems persist or return, this pattern suggests fundamental issues that cannot be resolved. There’s no shame in acknowledging that, despite your best efforts, the marriage isn’t working.

Recognizing when you’ve exhausted reasonable options for reconciliation is important. Continuing to cycle through the same problems without lasting improvement creates ongoing stress and prevents both spouses from moving forward with their lives.

How Certified Family Law Specialist Judy Burger Can Help

Making the decision to divorce is just the first step. Navigating California’s divorce process requires experienced legal guidance to protect your rights, assets, and future. Judy L. Burger brings the distinction of certification as a Family Law Specialist by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization—a credential held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys.

This certification requires extensive experience handling complex family law matters, passing a rigorous examination, and maintaining ongoing education in family law developments. When you work with a Certified Family Law Specialist, you’re working with an attorney who has demonstrated exceptional knowledge and skill in this specific area of law.

The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger provides comprehensive divorce representation throughout California. Judy and her team guide clients through every aspect of divorce, including property division, spousal support, child custody and visitation, child support, and complex asset valuation. Whether your divorce involves high-value assets, business interests, retirement accounts, or contentious custody disputes, Judy Burger has the experience to handle sophisticated cases.

Judy’s approach balances strong advocacy with practical problem-solving. She understands that while some divorces require aggressive litigation to protect clients’ interests, others benefit from collaborative approaches or mediation that reduce conflict and costs. She’ll help you understand your options, develop a strategic approach tailored to your circumstances, and work toward outcomes that protect your financial security and family relationships.

Frequently Asked Questions About California Divorce

How long does a California divorce take?

California requires a minimum six-month waiting period from when divorce papers are served until the divorce can be finalized. However, the actual timeline depends on case complexity and whether spouses agree on key issues. Uncontested divorces may conclude shortly after the six-month minimum, while contested divorces involving complex assets or custody disputes can take 12-18 months or longer.

What’s the difference between legal separation and divorce in California?

Legal separation addresses the same issues as divorce—property division, support, and custody—but spouses remain legally married. Some couples choose separation for religious reasons, to maintain health insurance benefits, or because they’re unsure about divorce. You can convert a legal separation to divorce later, and the six-month waiting period applies to divorce but not separation.

Do I need to prove fault to get divorced in California?

No. California is a no-fault divorce state, meaning you don’t need to prove wrongdoing to divorce. You simply need to state that you have “irreconcilable differences” that have caused the irretrievable breakdown of the marriage. While fault doesn’t determine whether you can divorce, it may impact issues like spousal support in cases involving domestic violence or extreme misconduct.

How is property divided in a California divorce?

California is a community property state, meaning assets and debts acquired during marriage are generally divided equally between spouses. Separate property—assets owned before marriage or received as gifts or inheritance—typically remains with the original owner. However, determining what’s community versus separate property can be complex, especially with commingled assets or businesses.

Can I get spousal support in my California divorce?

Spousal support (alimony) depends on factors including the length of the marriage, each spouse’s income and earning capacity, age and health, the standard of living during the marriage, and contributions to the other spouse’s education or career. Support isn’t automatic, but longer marriages where one spouse sacrificed career advancement often result in support awards. The amount and duration vary based on specific circumstances.

Take the First Step Toward Your Future

If you’re questioning whether it’s time for divorce, you deserve experienced, compassionate legal guidance to understand your options and rights. The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger provides the expertise and support you need during this challenging transition.

Contact Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger today to schedule a confidential consultation. With offices throughout California, we’re ready to listen to your concerns, answer your questions, and help you make informed decisions about your future.

Call us or visit our website to take the first step toward clarity and a new chapter in your life.

Does Domestic Violence Increase During the Holidays?
Domestic Violence, Restraining Order, Restraining Order

Does Domestic Violence Increase During the Holidays?

The answer is a troubling yes. While the holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, family togetherness, and celebration, for many individuals living with domestic violence, it represents a period of heightened danger and fear. Understanding this reality is critical for protecting vulnerable family members and knowing when and how to seek help.

The Statistics Tell a Sobering Story

Recent data confirms what domestic violence advocates have long observed: domestic violence spikes every year during the holidays. The numbers are significant and consistent across different regions.

  • An IPV study based on data gathered between 2005 and 2017 showed that 15% of all domestic violence-related visits to emergency rooms occurred during holiday periods, with New Year’s Eve having the highest incident rate.
  • San Antonio’s Metro Health reports domestic violence cases tend to rise by around 25% during the holidays. This trend isn’t isolated to one community. Police say several factors contribute to the increase in domestic violence during the holidays, including financial stress, alcohol and drugs, holiday shopping pressures, and family dynamics.
  • A 2024 report, “The Costs of Intimate Partner Violence in California,” reveals a cost of $73.7 billion to the state in health care, lost productivity and income, and criminal justice and response program spending for domestic violence cases in 2022 alone. This is about 2% of California’s gross domestic product. 

The pattern extends beyond just major winter holidays. Stress elevates, finances usually take a hit, alcohol and drug use tend to increase, and people are at home more with their family during various holiday periods throughout the year, creating multiple windows of increased risk.

Why Does Domestic Violence Increase During Holidays?

Several key elements create what some advocates call a “perfect storm” of risk factors.

Financial Stress and Economic Pressure

The expectation to buy gifts, host gatherings, and create picture-perfect celebrations places enormous financial strain on households. Financial stress is one of the most significant contributors to the rise in domestic violence during the holidays, as the pressure to buy gifts, host gatherings, and meet societal expectations can strain household budgets, often exacerbating existing tensions within relationships.

Increased Alcohol and Substance Use

The holiday season is often accompanied by increased alcohol consumption, which is a well-known risk factor for domestic violence, as alcohol can impair judgment and lower inhibitions, making it easier for underlying tensions to erupt into physical confrontations. Holiday parties and social gatherings often normalize excessive drinking, providing abusers with both opportunity and excuse for violent behavior.

Heightened Emotional Expectations

The cultural pressure to be happy, grateful, and family-oriented during the holidays creates additional stress for those in troubled relationships. The holidays can be emotionally taxing, as the expectation to maintain a cheerful demeanor, coupled with the stress of family interactions, can lead to heightened emotions, and for those already in volatile relationships, these emotional triggers can escalate conflicts into physical violence.

Increased Time Together and Isolation

With families spending extended time together, such as spouses or parents with school-age children back at home on a school break, the chances of violence within a household increase. Additionally, during the holidays, many support services like shelters and hotlines may have reduced hours or may be understaffed, making it more challenging for victims to seek help or escape abusive situations.

Control and Power Dynamics

While there are several factors that can fuel domestic violence during the holidays, the root cause usually involves one family member exerting control over another. The holidays provide abusers with additional opportunities to isolate victims from support systems, control finances, and manipulate family dynamics.

The Hidden Reality: The Honeymoon Phase

Interestingly, domestic violence shelters report a complex pattern during the holidays. Shelters actually see short dips this time of year, when survivors try to go back home, as the honeymoon phase kicks in with abusers saying, ‘I love you, I’m sorry, it’s the holidays. This cycle makes the holiday period particularly dangerous, as victims may return to unsafe situations hoping for change that rarely materializes.

How Judy Burger Can Help

If you’re experiencing domestic violence, taking legal action can be a critical step toward safety and protection. As a California Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy L. Burger has dedicated her practice to helping victims of domestic violence obtain the legal protection they need. This certification, held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, reflects advanced knowledge and proven experience in family law matters, including domestic violence cases.

Judy can help you obtain a domestic violence restraining order, which can provide multiple layers of protection. In California, these orders can require the abuser to stay away from you, your home, your workplace, and your children’s schools. They can also address child custody and visitation, require the abuser to move out of a shared residence, and prohibit the abuser from possessing firearms.

The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger understands the urgency of domestic violence situations. Judy and her team can guide you through the process of obtaining emergency protective orders, temporary restraining orders, and permanent restraining orders. They can also help you navigate related family law matters, including divorce, child custody, and property division, when domestic violence is a factor.

Beyond restraining orders, Judy can provide comprehensive legal representation if you’re going through a divorce involving domestic violence. She understands how abuse affects custody determinations, spousal support calculations, and property division. Her approach prioritizes your safety and your children’s safety while protecting your legal rights and financial interests.

Recognizing the Signs and Taking Action

Domestic violence takes many forms beyond physical abuse. In California, abuse can be emotional, psychological, verbal, or physical. It can include controlling access to money, isolating someone from friends and family, or engaging in coercive control that interferes with a person’s free will and personal liberty.

If you’re in immediate danger, always call 911 first. Once you’re safe, contacting an attorney who understands domestic violence can help you create a comprehensive safety plan and obtain legal protection.

The time when leaving or planning to leave an abusive relationship can be the most dangerous. Having a skilled attorney on your side ensures you understand your options, have proper legal documentation, and take steps that protect both your immediate safety and your long-term interests.

Holiday Domestic Violence FAQs

Can I get a restraining order during the holidays, even when courts are closed?

Yes. Law enforcement officers can request emergency protective orders from judges 24 hours a day, including holidays and weekends. These emergency orders last 5-7 days and go into effect immediately, giving you time to seek a longer-term domestic violence restraining order from the court when it reopens.

Does a domestic violence restraining order affect child custody during the holidays?

Yes. A domestic violence restraining order can include temporary custody and visitation orders that remain in effect during the holidays. The court prioritizes the safety of children when domestic violence is present, and holiday visitation schedules can be modified or supervised to ensure protection.

What if my abuser promises to change and wants me to drop the restraining order for the holidays?

You should never feel pressured to drop legal protection. The “honeymoon phase,” where abusers apologize and promise change, is a well-documented part of the cycle of violence. Consult with your attorney before making any decisions about modifying or dismissing a restraining order, regardless of promises made.

Can financial stress during the holidays be used as a defense for domestic violence?

No. While financial stress may be a contributing factor to increased tension, it is never an excuse or legal defense for domestic violence. California law protects victims regardless of the circumstances that may have contributed to the abuser’s behavior. Everyone has the right to live free from violence and abuse.

Is there a cost to file for a domestic violence restraining order in California?

No. There is no filing fee to request a domestic violence restraining order in California. The court process is designed to be accessible to all victims of domestic violence, regardless of their financial situation. Additionally, if your restraining order is granted, the court can order the abuser to pay your attorney’s fees and costs.

Take Action to Protect Yourself and Your Family

The holidays should be a time of safety, peace, and genuine celebration—not fear and danger. If you or someone you care about is experiencing domestic violence, especially during this high-risk holiday season, don’t wait to seek help.

The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger is here to provide the legal guidance and protection you need. With offices throughout California and a deep commitment to helping victims of domestic violence, Judy Burger and her team understand the courage it takes to seek help and the urgency of your situation.

Don’t let another holiday season pass in fear. Call The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger now and learn about your legal options for protection. Your safety and your children’s safety are too important to wait. Reach out today—we’re ready to help you reclaim your life and build a safer tomorrow.

If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For confidential support, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.

Reviewing Your Parenting Agreement for 2026
California Divorce, Child Custody, Child Support

Reviewing Your Parenting Agreement for 2026

As we move into 2026, it’s an ideal time to review your parenting agreement and ensure it still serves your family’s best interests. Children grow, circumstances change, and what worked last year may no longer be practical or appropriate. What happens then?

Why New Year Reviews Matter

The start of a new year brings natural transition points: new school semesters, changed work schedules, evolving extracurricular activities, and shifting family dynamics. These changes often reveal gaps or outdated provisions in existing parenting agreements. Rather than waiting for conflicts to arise, proactive parents use the new year as an opportunity to assess whether their current arrangements still work effectively.

Many parents discover that the informal adjustments they’ve made throughout the previous year should be formalized in their legal agreement. Others realize that their children’s developmental stages require different parenting time structures or decision-making processes. A new year review ensures your legal agreement reflects your actual parenting reality and protects everyone’s interests.

Common Issues of Concern with Parenting Agreements

Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger helps parents navigate the complexities of updating and modifying parenting agreements to reflect their current realities.

Children’s Changing Developmental Needs

As children grow, their needs evolve dramatically. A parenting schedule that worked perfectly for a toddler may be completely inappropriate for a teenager. Younger children typically need frequent contact with both parents and predictable routines, while teenagers often benefit from more flexible arrangements that accommodate their social lives, academic demands, and extracurricular commitments.

School-age children face increasing homework loads, sports practices, music lessons, and social obligations that may conflict with established parenting time schedules. Additionally, as children mature, their preferences about custody arrangements become more significant, and California courts consider children’s wishes when age-appropriate.

Work Schedule Changes

Employment changes significantly impact parenting agreements. A parent who accepted a promotion with different hours, started a new job with a modified schedule, or transitioned to remote work may find that their current parenting time arrangement no longer fits. Similarly, parents who’ve experienced job loss or reduced hours may seek increased parenting time or modifications to child support obligations.

The rise of hybrid work arrangements and flexible schedules has created new opportunities for distributing parenting time. Parents working from home may be able to accommodate midweek overnight visits that weren’t previously feasible, or provide care during times that previously required childcare arrangements.

Relocation Considerations

Whether across town or across the state, relocation dramatically affects parenting agreements. Even moving to a different school district within the same city can necessitate revisions to drop-off and pick-up arrangements, school designation clauses, and transportation responsibilities.

Long-distance moves require comprehensive agreement modifications addressing holiday schedules, summer vacation time, travel expenses, and virtual visitation arrangements. California law requires parents to provide notice before relocating with children, and such moves often trigger formal modification proceedings.

Holiday and Vacation Schedule Conflicts

Holiday schedules that seemed fair initially sometimes prove problematic in practice. Parents may discover that alternating years for major holidays creates hardships, especially when extended family traditions are involved. Additionally, as children age and develop relationships with step-siblings or extended family members, holiday priorities may shift.

Vacation planning often reveals agreement ambiguities. Questions arise about how much advance notice is required, whether vacation time supersedes regular parenting time, how travel expenses are divided, and what happens when both parents want the same vacation period.

Technology and Communication Issues

Modern parenting agreements must address technology-related concerns that didn’t exist a generation ago. Issues include which parent provides cell phones, who pays for devices and data plans, rules about social media access and monitoring, and protocols for virtual visitation when distance separates parent and child.

Communication between co-parents has also evolved with technology. While email and co-parenting apps can facilitate better communication, they can also create new conflicts. Agreements should specify communication methods, response timeframes, and guidelines for respectful interaction.

Educational and Medical Decision-Making

Disagreements about educational choices—including school selection, special education services, tutoring, or extracurricular activities—commonly arise as children’s needs become clearer over time. Similarly, medical decision-making disputes involving mental health treatment, elective procedures, medication management, or alternative therapies may require clarification of the agreement.

The pandemic’s aftermath has introduced new considerations regarding vaccination decisions, remote learning options, and health precautions that many existing agreements don’t address.

How Certified Family Law Specialist Judy Burger Can Help

Judy L. Burger holds the prestigious designation of Certified Family Law Specialist by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization. This certification, held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, demonstrates exceptional knowledge, experience, and skill in family law matters, including modifications to parenting agreements.

With extensive experience helping California families navigate custody and visitation issues, Judy Burger understands that parenting agreements must be both legally sound and practically workable. She takes time to understand your family’s unique dynamics, your children’s specific needs, and your co-parenting challenges before recommending modifications.

The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger can help you determine whether informal modifications should be formalized, whether significant changes warrant formal modification proceedings, or whether mediation might resolve disputes without court intervention. Judy’s approach prioritizes children’s best interests while protecting your parental rights and creating sustainable solutions.

Whether you need minor tweaks to an existing agreement or comprehensive modifications addressing changed circumstances, Judy Burger provides strategic guidance grounded in deep knowledge of California family law. She helps parents draft clear, comprehensive provisions that minimize future disputes and create frameworks for addressing issues as they arise.

Frequently Asked Questions About Parenting Agreements

How often should I review my parenting agreement?

Parents should review their parenting agreements at least annually, ideally at the start of each year or before the new school year begins. Additionally, review your agreement whenever significant life changes occur, such as job changes, relocations, remarriage, or shifts in your child’s needs. Regular reviews help identify issues before they become conflicts.

Can we modify our parenting agreement without going to court?

Yes, if both parents agree to modifications, you can create a written stipulation outlining the changes and submit it to the court for approval. This process is typically faster and less expensive than contested modification proceedings. However, informal changes without court approval aren’t legally enforceable, so formalizing even agreed-upon modifications is important.

What constitutes a significant change of circumstances for modification?

California courts require a significant change of circumstances to modify custody orders. This includes substantial changes in a parent’s living situation, work schedule, or ability to care for the child; the child’s changing needs as they mature; relocation; remarriage affecting the household; or evidence that the current arrangement harms the child’s welfare.

How does my child’s preference factor into agreement modifications?

California law allows courts to consider children’s preferences when they’re mature enough to express reasoned opinions, typically around age 14. However, judges consider children’s wishes as one factor among many, not the sole determining factor. The child’s reasoning, both parents’ relationships with the child, and the child’s overall best interests all matter.

What if my co-parent won’t agree to the necessary changes?

When parents cannot agree on modifications, you can file a Request for Order asking the court to modify your parenting agreement. You’ll need to demonstrate that circumstances have changed significantly since the original order and that the proposed modification serves your child’s best interests. Having experienced legal representation significantly improves your chances of achieving favorable modifications.

Start 2026 with a Parenting Agreement That Works

Don’t let an outdated parenting agreement create unnecessary stress and conflict in 2026. Whether you need minor adjustments or significant modifications, The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger provides the experienced guidance you need to create parenting arrangements that truly serve your family’s current needs.

Contact Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger today to schedule a consultation. With offices throughout California, we’re ready to review your existing agreement, identify areas needing modification, and help you create solutions that prioritize your children’s well-being while protecting your parental rights.

Call us or visit our website to take the first step toward a parenting agreement that works for your family in 2026 and beyond.

Dealing with Ongoing Financial Obligations During a Divorce
California Divorce, Debt, Mediation, Property Division

Ongoing Financial Obligations During a Divorce

Divorce is rarely simple, and one of the most challenging aspects is managing ongoing financial obligations while your case works its way through the legal system. In California, divorce proceedings can take months or even years to finalize, and during that time, bills don’t stop coming. Mortgages, car payments, credit cards, and children’s expenses continue to demand attention, often creating stress and conflict between separating spouses.

Common Ongoing Financial Obligations

Understanding how to handle these shared financial responsibilities during divorce is crucial for protecting your credit, maintaining stability for your children, and positioning yourself for a fair settlement. At The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, we help clients navigate these complex financial waters with clarity and strategic planning.

Mortgage and Housing Costs

For most couples, the family home represents their largest shared financial obligation. During a divorce, questions arise about who should pay the mortgage, property taxes, homeowners’ insurance, and maintenance costs. If one spouse moves out, should they still contribute? What happens if the remaining spouse can’t afford the full payment alone? These questions become even more complicated when home equity is a significant marital asset that will eventually be divided.

Credit Card Debt

Credit cards opened during marriage are typically considered community debt in California, regardless of whose name appears on the account. During divorce proceedings, new charges may accumulate, and existing balances may continue to accrue interest. Disputes often arise about who should pay for which cards, especially when one spouse believes the other is spending irresponsibly.

Auto Loans and Leases

Vehicle payments present unique challenges when spouses separate. The person driving the car isn’t always the person whose name is on the loan. If you’re making payments on a vehicle your spouse is using, or vice versa, this creates an ongoing source of financial tension and potential leverage in negotiations.

Children’s Expenses

Even before formal child support orders are established, children need food, clothing, medical care, childcare, and educational expenses. Parents must figure out how to share these costs fairly while living separately, often with reduced household incomes due to the expenses of maintaining two homes.

Utilities and Services

Phone plans, internet, streaming services, insurance policies, and utility bills often remain in one person’s name while both spouses are benefiting from them. Separating these accounts and determining who pays what during the divorce process requires careful coordination.

Spousal Support Obligations

In some cases, temporary spousal support may be ordered while the divorce is pending, creating a new financial obligation that must be met regardless of other financial pressures.

How Ongoing Financial Obligations Complicate Divorce

How can these expenses complicate matters if not handled properly?

Credit Score Impact

When financial obligations aren’t met during divorce, both spouses’ credit scores can suffer, even if only one person stopped making payments. A joint mortgage or credit card in both names means both parties are legally responsible, and missed payments appear on both credit reports.

Leverage and Power Imbalances

The spouse who controls the finances or earns more income may have significant leverage during divorce negotiations. They might threaten to stop paying certain obligations to pressure the other spouse into accepting unfavorable terms.

Documentation Challenges

Tracking who paid what during the separation period becomes critical for property division and reimbursement claims. Without clear records, disputes arise about whether certain payments should be credited against the final settlement.

Emotional Decision-Making

Financial stress during divorce often leads to poor decisions made out of anger, fear, or desperation. One spouse might max out credit cards, stop paying bills out of spite, or make large purchases to “get their share” before assets are divided.

Temporary Orders Delays

It can take weeks or months to get temporary orders in place addressing financial obligations. During this gap, couples must somehow figure out payment arrangements on their own, often without clear legal guidance.

Practical Advice for Managing Financial Obligations

Attorney Judy Burger has vast experience helping divorcing couples through these murky financial waters. Here are her top recommendations:

  1. Document Everything: Keep meticulous records of every payment you make, including screenshots, bank statements, and receipts. Note the date, amount, and purpose of each payment. This documentation protects you if disputes arise over who paid what during the divorce.
  2. Communicate in Writing: Discuss financial matters with your spouse via email or text message whenever possible. Written communication creates a clear record and reduces misunderstandings about payment agreements.
  3. Open Separate Accounts Immediately: If you haven’t already, open individual bank accounts and credit cards in your name only. Begin redirecting your income to your separate account. This prevents your spouse from accessing or depleting funds you’ll need for living expenses and legal fees.
  4. Request Temporary Orders Quickly: Don’t wait to seek temporary orders addressing financial obligations. These court orders can establish who pays what during the divorce process, providing structure and legal enforceability. Temporary support orders can also be established to help the lower-earning spouse meet basic needs.
  5. Continue Making Agreed-Upon Payments: Even if you’re angry with your spouse, continue making payments on joint obligations where possible. Defaulting on mortgages or loans hurts both of you and can complicate property division. Your attorney can seek reimbursement for payments you made on your spouse’s behalf.
  6. Prioritize Secured Debt: If you must choose which bills to pay, prioritize secured debts like mortgages and car loans. Defaulting on these can result in foreclosure or repossession, creating far more serious problems than late credit card payments.
  7. Consider Mediation for Financial Disputes: If you and your spouse can’t agree on how to handle ongoing obligations, mediation may help you reach temporary agreements without costly court battles.

How Judy Burger Can Help

As a California Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy L. Burger has dedicated her practice to helping clients through the financial complexities of divorce. This certification, held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, reflects advanced knowledge and proven experience in family law matters.

Judy can help you obtain temporary orders quickly to establish clear financial obligations during your divorce. She’ll work to protect your credit and financial interests while building a strong case for fair property division. Her team can help you gather and organize financial documentation, identify hidden assets or debts, and develop strategies for managing obligations during the divorce process.

Whether through negotiation, mediation, or litigation, Judy Burger provides skilled representation focused on achieving outcomes that protect your financial future.

Divorce and Finances FAQs

Am I responsible for debts my spouse incurs after we separate?

In California, debts incurred after the date of separation are generally considered separate debt, belonging only to the spouse who incurred them. However, establishing the exact separation date can be complex, and some exceptions apply. Proper legal guidance is essential.

Can I stop paying the mortgage if I move out of the family home?

This depends on several factors, including who is named on the mortgage and what temporary orders are in place. Stopping payment can damage your credit and affect property division. Consult with an attorney before making this decision.

What happens if my spouse empties our joint bank account?

California law requires full financial disclosure and prohibits dissipating marital assets. If your spouse empties accounts, you may be entitled to reimbursement. Document the withdrawal and contact an attorney immediately.

How quickly can I get temporary spousal support?

Temporary support orders can typically be obtained within a few weeks to a couple of months of filing a request with the court. The timeline depends on court scheduling and whether your spouse contests the request.

Should we file taxes jointly during our divorce?

This depends on your specific situation. Filing jointly may provide tax benefits, but it also creates joint liability. Your attorney and tax professional should review your circumstances before you decide.

Protect Your Financial Future Today

Navigating financial obligations during divorce requires strategic planning and knowledgeable legal guidance. Don’t face these challenges alone or make costly mistakes that could affect your financial security for years to come.

Contact The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger today to schedule a consultation. With offices throughout California, Judy Burger and her team are ready to help you protect your interests and achieve a fair resolution. Call now to discuss your situation and learn how we can help you move forward with confidence and financial stability.

Property Division Complexities Unique to a Graying Divorce
California Divorce, Property Division, Property Division

Property Division Complexities Unique to a Graying Divorce

Divorce after age 50, often called “graying divorce,” has become increasingly common in California. While any divorce involves challenging property division decisions, gray divorce presents unique complexities that require specialized legal expertise.

Understanding Gray Divorce Property Division

When couples divorce later in life, they typically have accumulated significantly more assets than younger couples. However, they also have less time to rebuild their financial security before retirement. This creates a high-stakes situation where every decision about property division can dramatically impact your quality of life for decades to come.

Unlike younger couples who may still be building their careers and assets, gray divorce involves dividing retirement accounts, pension plans, investment portfolios, real estate holdings, and potentially business interests accumulated over 20, 30, or even 40 years of marriage. The complexity multiplies when considering tax implications, retirement timing, and long-term care needs.

Common Property Division Complexities in Gray Divorce

Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger understands the intricate financial landscape that older couples face when ending their marriages.

Retirement Accounts and Pensions

Retirement assets often represent the largest marital asset in gray divorce cases. Dividing 401(k)s, IRAs, pension plans, and other retirement vehicles requires careful attention to avoid devastating tax consequences. A Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) is typically necessary to divide retirement accounts without triggering early withdrawal penalties. However, different types of retirement accounts have different rules, and timing matters significantly.

Pension plans present particular challenges because they involve future income streams rather than current assets. Determining the present value of a pension requires actuarial calculations, and deciding whether to divide the pension itself or offset it with other assets requires sophisticated financial analysis.

Social Security Considerations

While Social Security benefits themselves cannot be divided in a divorce, your marital history affects your eligibility for spousal benefits. If you were married for at least 10 years, you may be entitled to claim benefits based on your ex-spouse’s earnings record. Understanding how divorce timing affects these benefits is crucial, and sometimes waiting a few months to finalize a divorce can make a significant financial difference.

Real Estate and Family Homes

The family home often holds both financial and emotional significance in gray divorce. Some couples have substantial equity built up over decades, while others may still carry mortgages. Decisions about whether to sell the home, allow one spouse to buy out the other, or delay the sale until a future date all carry different financial and tax implications.

Additionally, gray divorcing couples may own vacation properties, rental properties, or investment real estate that must be valued and divided. Capital gains taxes, rental income considerations, and property management responsibilities all factor into equitable division decisions.

Business Interests and Professional Practices

Many individuals reaching gray divorce age own businesses or professional practices. Valuing these entities fairly requires expert appraisals, and dividing them may involve complex buyout arrangements, continued co-ownership structures, or offsetting with other marital assets. Business valuation becomes particularly complicated when the business owner’s spouse’s personal expertise drives much of the company’s value.

Healthcare and Long-Term Care Planning

Healthcare considerations loom large in gray divorce. The spouse who was covered under their partner’s employer health insurance must secure alternative coverage, which can be expensive for those not yet eligible for Medicare. Long-term care insurance policies, health savings accounts, and provisions for future medical expenses all require careful consideration during property division.

Estate Planning Implications

Gray divorce necessitates a complete revision of estate plans, including wills, trusts, powers of attorney, and beneficiary designations. Failing to update these documents after a divorce can result in unintended consequences. Additionally, property division agreements should consider each spouse’s estate planning goals and ensure that the division aligns with their wishes for passing assets to children or other heirs.

How Certified Family Law Specialist Judy Burger Can Help

Judy L. Burger brings the distinction of being a Certified Family Law Specialist by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization—a credential held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys. This certification requires extensive experience, ongoing education, and demonstrated expertise in complex family law matters.

With decades of experience handling high-asset divorces and gray divorce cases, Judy Burger understands the unique challenges facing older divorcing couples. She works with financial experts, tax professionals, and actuaries to ensure that all property division decisions are based on accurate valuations and comprehensive financial analysis.

The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger takes a strategic approach to gray divorce property division, focusing on your long-term financial security rather than simply achieving a quick settlement. Judy and her team analyze the tax implications of various division scenarios, project retirement income under different arrangements, and negotiate settlements that protect your ability to maintain your lifestyle throughout retirement.

Frequently Asked Questions About Gray Divorce

How is property divided in a California gray divorce?

California is a community property state, meaning assets acquired during marriage are generally divided equally. However, gray divorces often involve complex assets requiring expert valuation, and spouses can negotiate unequal divisions if both agree. Separate property acquired before marriage or through inheritance remains with the original owner.

Will I have to pay spousal support in a gray divorce?

Spousal support is common in gray divorce cases, especially when one spouse sacrificed career advancement for family responsibilities. California courts consider factors such as the length of the marriage, each spouse’s earning capacity, age, health, and standard of living during the marriage when determining support amounts and duration.

How does divorce affect my retirement timeline?

Gray divorce can significantly impact retirement plans. Dividing retirement assets reduces each spouse’s nest egg, potentially requiring delayed retirement or lifestyle adjustments. Working with financial advisors during the divorce process helps you understand how different property division scenarios affect your retirement timeline.

Can I keep the family home in a gray divorce?

Keeping the family home is possible but requires careful financial analysis. You must be able to afford the mortgage, property taxes, insurance, and maintenance on a single income. Sometimes refinancing is necessary to remove your ex-spouse from the mortgage, which requires qualifying based on your individual income and credit.

How long does a graying divorce take in California?

California requires a minimum six-month waiting period from when divorce papers are served until the divorce can be finalized. However, gray divorces with complex property division often take 12-18 months or longer to complete, especially if business valuations, pension appraisals, or disputed issues require resolution.

Protect Your Financial Future

Gray divorce property division decisions will impact the rest of your life. Don’t navigate these complex waters alone. The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger provides the experienced, specialized representation you need to secure your financial future.

Contact Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger today for a consultation. With offices throughout California, we’re ready to help you understand your rights, explore your options, and achieve a property division that protects your retirement and long-term security.

Call us or visit our website to schedule your confidential consultation and take the first step toward your new chapter.

Shared Custody Tips for Managing the Holidays
Child Custody

Shared Custody Tips for Managing the Holidays

The holiday season should be a time of joy and celebration for children, but for divorced or separated parents, it can become a source of stress and conflict. Whether it’s Thanksgiving, winter holidays, spring break, or summer vacations, navigating shared custody during special occasions requires careful planning, clear communication, and a commitment to prioritizing your children’s needs.

At The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, we understand the complexities of shared custody arrangements in California. As a Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy Burger has helped countless families create workable holiday schedules that prioritize children’s well-being while respecting both parents’ rights to meaningful time with their kids.

Common Holiday Custody Challenges

Holiday custody disputes are among the most emotionally charged issues facing separated parents. Understanding these common problems can help you avoid them before they escalate.

Last-Minute Schedule Changes

One parent may attempt to alter agreed-upon plans without adequate notice, leaving the other parent scrambling to adjust their holiday preparations. This creates unnecessary tension and disappoints children who were looking forward to specific celebrations.

Conflicting Family Traditions

Each parent may have strong feelings about maintaining family traditions, from specific holiday meals to religious observances. When these traditions conflict with the custody schedule, resentment can build quickly.

Extended Family Expectations

Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other relatives often have their own expectations about seeing the children during holidays. Managing these relationships while honoring custody agreements adds another layer of complexity.

Travel Complications

Holiday travel plans can clash with custody schedules, especially when one parent wants to take children out of state or abroad. Without clear guidelines in your custody order, these situations can lead to serious disputes.

Unequal Holiday Distribution

Parents may feel the division of holidays is unfair, particularly when major celebrations fall close together or when alternating years means missing important milestones.

Actionable Tips for Successful Holiday Co-Parenting in Shared Custody

Here are some steps you can take before every holiday to help things go smoothly:

  1. Plan Well in Advance: Review your custody agreement at least two to three months before major holidays. Mark all important dates on a shared calendar and discuss any potential conflicts early. This gives both parents time to make arrangements and reduces the likelihood of misunderstandings.
  2. Communicate in Writing: Use email, text, or co-parenting apps to document all holiday arrangements. Written communication creates a clear record of agreements and helps prevent “he said, she said” disputes. Keep your messages focused on logistics and the children’s best interests.
  3. Be Flexible and Willing to Negotiate: Life doesn’t always follow the custody schedule to the letter. If your co-parent requests a reasonable schedule swap, consider accommodating them when possible. This goodwill often comes back around when you need flexibility yourself.
  4. Focus on the Children’s Experience: Remember that holidays are about creating positive memories for your children, not winning time with them. Avoid speaking negatively about your co-parent, and encourage your children to enjoy their time with both families.
  5. Create New Traditions: You don’t have to celebrate every holiday on the exact date. If your children spend Thanksgiving Day with their other parent, create a special “Thanksgiving weekend” celebration with your extended family. Children can adapt to new traditions more easily than adults.
  6. Respect the Custody Order: Your custody agreement is a legal document. Even if you disagree with certain provisions, following the order demonstrates respect for the legal process and sets a positive example for your children. If the current arrangement truly isn’t working, seek legal modification rather than unilaterally changing plans.
  7. Keep Extended Family Informed: Share your custody schedule with grandparents and other relatives early. This helps them plan their own gatherings around when the children will be available and reduces pressure on you to violate custody agreements.
  8. Prepare for Travel Properly: If your custody order requires notification or consent for travel, provide proper documentation well in advance. Share travel itineraries, contact information, and accommodation details with your co-parent. This transparency builds trust and ensures everyone knows how to reach the children if needed.
  9. Consider the Children’s Preferences: As children get older, their own wishes about holiday time become increasingly important. While you shouldn’t burden them with making custody decisions, listening to their feelings can help you create arrangements that work better for everyone.
  10. Document Everything: Keep records of holiday exchanges, communications about schedule changes, and any agreements you reach outside the formal custody order. This documentation can be valuable if disputes arise or if you need to modify your custody arrangement.

How Judy Burger Can Help

Navigating holiday custody doesn’t have to be overwhelming. As a California Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy L. Burger brings extensive experience and specialized knowledge to custody matters. This certification, held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, demonstrates her advanced knowledge and commitment to this complex area of law.

Judy can help you create comprehensive custody agreements that address holiday schedules in detail, reducing ambiguity and future conflicts. If your current arrangement isn’t working, she can guide you through the modification process. For parents facing custody disputes, Judy provides skilled representation that prioritizes your children’s best interests while protecting your parental rights.

Child Custody FAQs

Can I modify our holiday custody schedule if it’s not working?

Yes, you can request a modification if you can demonstrate a change in circumstances. The court will consider what arrangement serves the children’s best interests. Working with an experienced family law attorney increases your chances of a successful modification.

What happens if my co-parent violates our holiday custody order?

Violations of custody orders can have serious legal consequences. Document the violation and consult with a family law attorney about your options, which may include filing a motion for contempt or requesting a modification.

Do teenagers get to choose which parent they spend holidays with?

While California courts consider children’s preferences, especially as they mature, the final decision rests with the court based on the child’s best interests. Typically, children aged 14 and older have more input, but they don’t have absolute choice.

How far in advance must I notify my co-parent about holiday travel plans?

This depends on your specific custody order. Many agreements require 30 to 60 days’ notice for out-of-state travel. Always review your order and provide as much advance notice as possible.

What if we can’t agree on how to split the holidays?

If you cannot reach an agreement through negotiation or mediation, the court will decide based on the children’s best interests. Having experienced legal representation ensures your position is effectively presented.

Take the Next Step with Shared Custody Assistance

Don’t let holiday custody stress overshadow what should be joyful times with your children. Whether you need help creating a workable shared custody schedule, modifying an existing order, or resolving a custody dispute, The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger is here to help.

Contact us today for a consultation. With offices throughout California and a commitment to personalized service, Judy Burger and her team will provide the guidance you need to navigate custody challenges successfully. Call now to schedule your appointment and take the first step toward peaceful, child-focused holiday celebrations for years to come.

What Can I Do If I Suspect My Ex’s New Partner Is Mistreating the Children?
California Divorce, Child Custody, Domestic Violence

What Can I Do If I Suspect My Ex’s New Partner Is Mistreating the Children?

Co-parenting after a divorce can be challenging, especially when new partners are involved. If you suspect that your ex-spouse’s new partner is mistreating your children, it becomes crucial to take action to ensure their safety and well-being.

Let’s explore the legal parameters of abuse under California law, provide steps you can take if you suspect mistreatment, and explain how The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger can assist you in navigating this challenging situation.

Understanding Child Abuse Under California Law

California law defines child abuse broadly, encompassing physical, emotional, and neglectful behaviors. The key statutes involved in child abuse cases include:

  1. Physical Abuse: This refers to any non-accidental physical harm inflicted on a child. It can include hitting, burning, or any act that results in physical injury.
  2. Emotional Abuse: Emotional abuse includes behaviors that harm a child’s emotional development or sense of self-worth. This can involve constant criticism, intimidation, or isolation.
  3. Neglect: Neglect occurs when a caregiver fails to provide necessary care, supervision, or emotional support, putting the child’s health or safety at risk.

California Child Welfare Services takes reports of suspected abuse seriously. When a child’s safety is at stake, taking immediate action is critical.

Steps to Take If You Suspect Mistreatment

Never hesitate to investigate and report mistreatment of your children. Here are the steps to take:

1. Document Your Observations

Keep a detailed record of any concerning behaviors or incidents that lead you to suspect mistreatment. This documentation should include dates, times, descriptions of events, and any remarks made by the children that indicate mistreatment. Photographic evidence of injuries or changes in behavior can also be helpful.

2. Talk to Your Children

Approach your children in a calm and supportive manner. Let them know they can speak openly without fear of repercussions. Ask them about their experiences with their new partner, but do so gently. Avoid leading questions that may suggest how they should respond.

3. Consult With a Child Psychologist

If your children display signs of distress or behavioral changes, consulting a child psychologist may be beneficial. A professional can provide insights into any underlying issues of mistreatment and may help document the effects of any abuse on your child.

4. Reach Out to Your Ex-Spouse

If you feel it is safe to do so, consider discussing your concerns with your ex-spouse. Communicate your feelings respectfully, focusing on the children’s well-being. If they are receptive, this may provide an opportunity to address the situation cooperatively.

5. Contact Child Protective Services (CPS)

If you have substantial reason to believe that your children are in imminent danger or that their new partner poses a threat, it is vital to contact CPS or your local law enforcement agency. They can investigate your claims. Be prepared to provide them with the documentation you have gathered.

6. Seek Legal Counsel

If you believe your children are being mistreated and you have reasons to act on your suspicions, it is essential to consult with a knowledgeable family law attorney. A legal professional can guide you through the necessary steps to safeguard your child’s welfare, which may include modifying custody or visitation arrangements.

How The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger Can Help

At The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, we understand the emotional turmoil that accompanies concerns about a child’s safety. Our firm is committed to safeguarding children and promoting their well-being.

  • Legal Guidance: Judy L. Burger is a California Certified Family Law Specialist with extensive experience in family law matters. She can provide you with the legal knowledge and support you need if you suspect your children are being mistreated.
  • Custody Modifications: If the situation necessitates a change in custody arrangements, Judy can help you navigate the legal process of modifying custody orders to protect your children.
  • Protective Orders: We can also assist in drafting any necessary legal documentation, such as protective orders aimed at ensuring the safety of the children during visitation periods.
  • Mediation and Negotiation: Our firm prioritizes amicable resolutions and can facilitate discussions with your ex-spouse regarding the concerns at hand, seeking collaborative solutions that prioritize the children’s welfare.

FAQs About Child Mistreating After Divorce

What constitutes child abuse in California?

Child abuse can include physical harm, emotional harm, and neglect. Any behavior that is harmful to a child’s physical or emotional well-being may fall under the definition of abuse.

How can I report suspected child abuse?

If you suspect child abuse, you can report your concerns to California’s Child Protective Services or local law enforcement. They will investigate the situation and take necessary action.

What should I do if my children tell me about mistreatment?

Listen supportively and document their statements. Encourage them to express their feelings, and consider seeking professional help if they seem distressed.

Can I file for custody modification if I suspect my ex’s partner is abusive?

Yes. If you believe your children are in danger, you can seek legal counsel to file for a modification of custody arrangements to protect your children.

How can Judy Burger assist me in this situation?

Judy Burger specializes in family law and can provide legal guidance, help in addressing custody issues, and assist with any necessary legal protective measures to safeguard your children.

Ensure the Safety of Your Children

Ensuring the safety and well-being of your children should be a priority. If you suspect that your ex-spouse’s new partner is mistreating them, it is essential to take action. Documentation, communication, and legal support are critical steps in addressing the issue effectively. At The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, we are here to stand by your side and help you navigate these challenging circumstances, ensuring your children’s safety comes first.

Can My Spouse Be Involved with Obtaining Childcare If I Have Primary Custody of Our Children?
California Divorce, Child Custody

Can My Spouse Be Involved with Obtaining Childcare If I Have Primary Custody of Our Children?

Navigating custody arrangements after a divorce can be one of the most challenging aspects for parents. When one parent has primary custody of the children, they often wonder how involved their ex-spouse can be in decisions about childcare.

Understanding sole, joint, and other forms of custody, and the rights and responsibilities associated with each arrangement, is crucial to ensuring that the best interests of the children are maintained. In California, the complexities of custody arrangements can be effectively managed with the guidance of a skilled family law specialist, such as Judy L. Burger.

Understanding Custody Types

In California, custody is primarily categorized into two types: physical custody and legal custody.

  1. Physical Custody refers to where the children live and who they spend their time with.
  2. Legal Custody pertains to the right to make decisions about the child’s upbringing, including education, healthcare, and general welfare.

Primary Physical Custody means that one parent has the majority of the time with the children, while the other parent may have visitation rights. In contrast,  joint physical custody happens when both parents have significant, but not necessarily equal, time shares of raising the children. At times, a parent may have sole physical custody.

Legal Custody is not based on the amount of visitation each parent has but is agreed to or ordered by the Court. If the parties have joint legal custody, they work together to reach agreements regarding the child’s health, education, and welfare. If a parent has sole legal custody that make these decisions on their own without the other party’s participation.

Childcare specifically is a Legal Custody Issue.

  • Rights and Responsibilities as the Primary Physical Custody Parent. As the parent with primary physical custody, you do not necessarily have the right to make decisions on your own. The decision-making is determined by whether there is joint or sole legal custody.
  • Decision-Making Authority: If you have joint legal custody, both parents are involved in making the important decisions regarding the child’s education, healthcare, and overall welfare. This includes selecting schools, approving medical treatments, and overseeing extracurricular activities. If you have sole legal custody, you make these decisions on your own.
  • Communication and Cooperation: Although you may have sole legal custody, maintaining open communication with your ex-spouse can help ensure that both parents remain actively involved in their children’s lives. California courts encourage co-parenting, and fostering a cooperative spirit can benefit the children emotionally and socially.
  • Childcare Arrangements: If you have joint legal custody, both parents work together to choose a childcare provider. If you have sole legal custody, you choose the child care yourself. Essentially, if legal custody specifies that both parents must agree on childcare arrangements, a cooperative approach is necessary.

Childcare Decision-Making Challenges

Every family situation is unique, and conflicts may arise regarding childcare arrangements, especially when competing parental interests are involved. Understanding your rights and how custody impacts decision-making can help alleviate potential disputes:

Disputes Over Care Providers

If you choose a childcare provider, your ex-spouse may want to have a say, especially if they have joint legal custody rights. Open discussions or mediation can help reach a consensus that respects the opinions of both parties.

Extra-Curricular Activities

Decisions about enrolling children in extracurricular activities can become contentious. If both parents share joint legal custody, both have a say in these decisions, which can lead to discussions about costs, schedules, and care providers during activities.

Modifications to Custody Agreements

If your ex-spouse wishes to change the custody agreement or has concerns about childcare arrangements, they may petition the court for modifications. In such instances, the court will consider the children’s best interests.

Incorporating New Partners

The involvement of a new partner by either parent can complicate childcare arrangements. Open and honest communication about household dynamics with your ex-spouse is crucial to ensure a stable environment for the children.

How a California Certified Family Law Specialist Can Help

Navigating custody arrangements can be daunting, especially when tensions arise between parents. Having a skilled family law attorney like Judy L. Burger can help you understand your rights and responsibilities better. Judy offers:

  • Expert Guidance: With extensive experience in California family law, Judy can help you understand the nuances of your specific situation, including custody rights and obligations.
  • Mediation Services: Should disputes occur, Judy can serve as a mediator to facilitate discussions, helping both parents reach mutually beneficial agreements regarding childcare.
  • Court Representation: If litigation becomes necessary, Judy can represent your interests in court, ensuring that your voice is heard and that any agreements put forth are fair and just.
  • Modification Assistance: Life circumstances can change, and if you need to modify existing custody arrangements or childcare decisions, Judy can help navigate the legal process effectively.

Frequently Asked Questions about Primary Custody

Can my spouse challenge my sole legal custody decisions?

Yes, your spouse can file for a modification of the custody order if they believe it’s in the child’s best interest to change the current arrangement.

What happens if we disagree on childcare providers?

If both parents have legal custody, it’s essential to communicate openly and may require mediation to resolve disagreements amicably.

Can I choose a childcare provider without consulting my ex-spouse?

If you have sole legal custody, you likely have the right to make this decision independently, but collaboration can foster a better co-parenting relationship.

Help with Primary Custody Childcare & Other Decisions

Navigating custody and child care decisions can be complex and emotionally charged. However, with the proper guidance and communication, you can create a fulfilling and supportive environment for your children. Contact Judy L. Burger for expert legal assistance tailored to your unique family situation.