Domestic Violence, Restraining Order, Restraining Order

What Should I Know Before Requesting an Ex Parte Hearing?

December 23, 2025 TRIWriter

Family law emergencies don’t always wait for regularly scheduled court dates. When urgent situations threaten your safety, your children’s well-being, or your financial security, California law provides a mechanism for immediate court intervention: the ex parte hearing. The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, led by Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger, has extensive experience handling ex parte matters and can provide swift, strategic representation for urgent situations.

Understanding Ex Parte Hearings in California

An ex parte hearing is an emergency court proceeding requested on shortened notice—sometimes with little or no advance notice to the other party. The term “ex parte” means “from one party,” indicating that these hearings can proceed even if the other side hasn’t had the typical amount of time to prepare a response.

Unlike regular motions that require 16 court days’ notice, ex parte applications can be heard within days or even hours of filing. California courts reserve ex parte hearings for genuine emergencies where waiting for a regular hearing would cause immediate harm or irreparable injury. Judges scrutinize ex parte requests carefully because they deviate from the normal process that gives both parties adequate time to prepare.

Ex parte hearings are not the appropriate venue for routine disputes or matters that have existed for weeks or months without creating immediate danger. Courts expect parties to use regular motion procedures unless circumstances truly qualify as emergencies requiring immediate judicial intervention.

When Ex Parte Relief Is Appropriate

California family courts grant ex parte hearings in specific urgent circumstances, including:

Immediate Safety Concerns: When domestic violence, child abuse, threats of harm, or kidnapping risks exist, ex parte hearings allow victims to obtain immediate protective orders, modify custody arrangements, or secure other safety measures without delay. These situations represent the clearest justification for emergency relief.
Child Custody Emergencies: Beyond safety threats, ex parte custody relief may be appropriate when a parent violates existing custody orders by refusing to return a child, when a parent plans to leave the jurisdiction with the child without permission, or when a child faces immediate risk of harm in their current placement.
Financial Emergencies: Ex parte financial relief addresses situations like a spouse draining bank accounts, hiding or destroying marital assets, failing to pay court-ordered support, causing imminent eviction or utility shutoff, or refusing to maintain required insurance coverage. The key is demonstrating immediate, irreparable financial harm.
Property Protection: When a spouse threatens to sell, transfer, or destroy significant marital property, ex parte orders can prevent these actions until a regular hearing addresses property division properly.

Information and Documentation You Need

Successfully obtaining ex parte relief requires thorough preparation and compelling evidence. Courts won’t grant emergency orders based on general allegations or unsubstantiated claims. You should gather:

Detailed Declaration Under Penalty of Perjury

Your declaration must clearly explain what emergency exists, why you couldn’t address it through regular motion procedures, when you learned of the emergency, what immediate harm will occur without court intervention, and what specific relief you’re requesting. Include specific dates, times, locations, and factual details that demonstrate the urgency.

Supporting Evidence

Gather all available evidence supporting your emergency claim: police reports, medical records, photographs of injuries or property damage, threatening text messages or emails, bank statements showing asset dissipation, witness declarations, and documentation of violated court orders. The more concrete evidence you provide, the stronger your case.

Notice Requirements Documentation

California law requires you to notify the other party of your ex parte request unless doing so would create danger or defeat the emergency relief’s purpose. You must document your efforts to provide notice, including when and how you notified the other party or explain why notice wasn’t possible. Failure to properly handle notice requirements can result in the denial of your request.

Proposed Orders

Prepare clear, specific proposed orders stating exactly what you want the court to order. Vague requests reduce your chances of success. Your proposed orders should be narrowly tailored to address the specific emergency.

Financial Information

For financial emergencies or requests involving support or attorney fees, provide current income and expense declarations, account statements, and documentation of the financial crisis.

Existing Court Orders

Bring copies of all relevant existing court orders, especially if your ex parte request involves alleged violations of those orders.

How the Ex Parte Process Works in California

The ex parte process moves quickly but requires strict compliance with procedural rules. Generally, you must notify the court and the other party by 10:00 a.m. on the court day before your requested hearing date. Some courts have specific ex parte departments or calendars, while others hear ex parte matters at designated times.

At the hearing, you’ll have limited time to present your case—often just minutes. The judge will review your written materials, hear a brief oral argument, and may ask questions. If the other party appears, they’ll have an opportunity to respond. The judge will then decide whether to grant temporary emergency orders.

Ex parte orders are temporary. If the court grants your request, it will typically schedule a follow-up hearing—called an Order to Show Cause hearing—within a few weeks, where both parties can fully argue the issues. The ex parte orders remain in effect until that hearing unless modified.

How Certified Family Law Specialist Judy Burger Can Help

Ex parte proceedings are high-stakes, fast-paced legal matters requiring sophisticated knowledge of family law and courtroom experience. Judy L. Burger’s certification as a Family Law Specialist by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization demonstrates her exceptional expertise in handling complex, urgent family law matters.

This certification, earned by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, requires extensive experience, passing a rigorous examination, ongoing education, and peer recognition. When facing a family law emergency, working with a Certified Specialist provides significant advantages.

Judy Burger and her team understand what constitutes a true emergency warranting ex parte relief versus situations better addressed through regular procedures. She knows how to craft compelling declarations that clearly articulate the emergency, marshal persuasive evidence, comply with technical notice and procedural requirements, and present effective oral arguments in the limited time available.

The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger has successfully obtained ex parte orders protecting clients from domestic violence, preventing child abduction, stopping asset dissipation, and addressing other urgent matters throughout California. Judy’s experience includes representing clients at ex parte hearings and defending against improper ex parte requests.

Beyond obtaining immediate relief, Judy provides strategic guidance for the follow-up proceedings. Ex parte orders are just the first step; you need representation for the subsequent hearings where the court will determine whether to extend, modify, or terminate the emergency orders.

Frequently Asked Questions About Ex Parte Hearings

What happens if my ex parte request is denied?

If the court denies your ex parte request, you can still file a regular motion or Request for Order addressing the same issues through normal procedures. The denial doesn’t prevent you from seeking relief; it simply means the court didn’t find sufficient emergency circumstances to justify shortened notice. Your attorney can help you understand why the request was denied and develop an alternative strategy.

Can I request an ex parte hearing without an attorney?

While you can represent yourself in ex parte proceedings, doing so is risky. Ex parte hearings involve complex procedures, strict deadlines, and high stakes. Mistakes in paperwork, notice, or presentation can result in the denial of your request, potentially leaving you without protection in an emergency. The compressed timeline makes it especially difficult for self-represented parties to prepare effective requests.

How much does an ex parte hearing cost?

Costs vary based on case complexity and attorney fees, but ex parte matters typically require fewer attorney hours than regular motions due to the shortened timeline. Some ex parte requests include asking the court to order the other party to pay your attorney fees, especially in financial emergency situations.

What if the other party violates the ex parte order?

Violating court orders can result in contempt of court findings, fines, jail time, and other sanctions. If the other party violates an ex parte order, document the violations thoroughly and immediately inform your attorney. You may need to file an Order to Show Cause regarding contempt or request additional enforcement measures.

Can an ex parte order be overturned?

Yes. At the follow-up Order to Show Cause hearing, the responding party can present their full case, and the court may modify or terminate the ex parte orders based on complete information from both sides. This is why ex parte orders are temporary—they’re based on limited information presented in an emergency context. The subsequent hearing provides full due process for both parties.

Get Immediate Help for Your Family Law Emergency

When you’re facing a genuine family law emergency requiring immediate court intervention, time is critical. The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger provides experienced, strategic representation for ex parte matters throughout California.

Contact Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger immediately if you need emergency court relief. Our team understands the urgency of these situations and can quickly assess whether ex parte relief is appropriate, prepare compelling documentation, and provide effective representation at your emergency hearing.

Call us now or visit our website—when emergencies arise, every moment counts, and expert legal guidance can make all the difference in protecting you and your family.

California Divorce

How Do I Know It’s Time for a Divorce?

December 16, 2025 TRIWriter

Deciding whether to end a marriage is one of the most difficult decisions you’ll ever face. There’s no single moment when divorce becomes the obvious answer, and the path to this realization looks different for everyone.

Recognizing the Signs It May Be Time

Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger understands the emotional complexity of this decision and provides compassionate, strategic guidance when you’re considering divorce in California.

Communication Has Completely Broken Down

Healthy marriages involve disagreements, but also productive communication and conflict resolution. When you and your spouse can no longer have civil conversations, when every discussion escalates into an argument, or when you’ve stopped talking altogether, this signals serious relationship deterioration.

If you find yourself avoiding communication entirely, walking on eggshells to prevent conflict, or feeling unheard and dismissed whenever you try to express concerns, these patterns indicate a fundamental communication breakdown. When couples therapy and genuine efforts to improve communication have failed to create lasting change, divorce may be the healthiest option.

Trust Has Been Irreparably Damaged

Trust forms the foundation of marriage. Whether broken through infidelity, financial deception, hidden addictions, or repeated broken promises, shattered trust is extremely difficult to rebuild. While some couples successfully recover from betrayal through counseling and commitment, others find that trust, once broken, cannot be restored.

If you’ve tried to rebuild trust but find yourself constantly suspicious, checking up on your spouse, or unable to believe what they tell you, this ongoing distrust creates a toxic environment. Living in a state of perpetual doubt and anxiety isn’t sustainable and may indicate that the relationship cannot be salvaged.

You’re Staying Only for the Children

Many parents remain in unhappy marriages, believing it’s best for their children. However, research consistently shows that children suffer more from ongoing parental conflict than from divorce itself. If your primary reason for staying married is avoiding the impact on your children, consider whether they’re actually better off witnessing an unhappy, tense, or hostile relationship.

Children learn about relationships by watching their parents. Staying in a loveless or conflict-filled marriage may teach them that this is what relationships should look like. Sometimes divorce, handled thoughtfully with children’s needs prioritized, provides a healthier environment than an intact but dysfunctional household.

Emotional or Physical Abuse Is Present

Any form of abuse—physical violence, emotional manipulation, verbal attacks, financial control, or coercive behavior—is unacceptable and requires immediate action. Abuse typically escalates over time and rarely improves without intensive intervention that the abuser must genuinely commit to.

If you feel afraid of your spouse, if they control your access to money or friends, if they regularly demean or threaten you, or if any physical violence has occurred, your safety and your children’s safety must be the priority. In these situations, consulting with an experienced family law attorney about protective orders and safe exit strategies is crucial.

You’ve Grown Into Different People with Incompatible Goals

People change throughout life, and sometimes spouses grow in different directions. When your fundamental values, life goals, or visions for the future no longer align, and when compromise seems impossible, this incompatibility can make continuing the marriage untenable.

Perhaps one spouse wants children while the other doesn’t, or career ambitions require relocation that the other spouse refuses to consider. Maybe religious beliefs have changed, or lifestyle preferences have diverged dramatically. When core incompatibilities emerge, and neither spouse is willing or able to compromise, divorce may be the path forward.

You’ve Already Emotionally Divorced

Some marriages end long before the legal divorce papers are filed. If you feel emotionally detached from your spouse, if you no longer care about their daily life, if you’ve stopped trying to work on the relationship, or if you’re simply going through the motions while feeling numb or indifferent, you may have already emotionally divorced.

This emotional disconnection often manifests as living parallel lives under the same roof—separate schedules, separate interests, separate friends, and minimal meaningful interaction. When both spouses have checked out emotionally, and neither has interest in reconnecting, staying married often serves no purpose beyond convenience or fear of change.

Repeated Attempts at Reconciliation Have Failed

If you’ve genuinely tried to save your marriage through counseling, communication improvements, changed behaviors, trial separations, or other interventions, but problems persist or return, this pattern suggests fundamental issues that cannot be resolved. There’s no shame in acknowledging that, despite your best efforts, the marriage isn’t working.

Recognizing when you’ve exhausted reasonable options for reconciliation is important. Continuing to cycle through the same problems without lasting improvement creates ongoing stress and prevents both spouses from moving forward with their lives.

How Certified Family Law Specialist Judy Burger Can Help

Making the decision to divorce is just the first step. Navigating California’s divorce process requires experienced legal guidance to protect your rights, assets, and future. Judy L. Burger brings the distinction of certification as a Family Law Specialist by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization—a credential held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys.

This certification requires extensive experience handling complex family law matters, passing a rigorous examination, and maintaining ongoing education in family law developments. When you work with a Certified Family Law Specialist, you’re working with an attorney who has demonstrated exceptional knowledge and skill in this specific area of law.

The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger provides comprehensive divorce representation throughout California. Judy and her team guide clients through every aspect of divorce, including property division, spousal support, child custody and visitation, child support, and complex asset valuation. Whether your divorce involves high-value assets, business interests, retirement accounts, or contentious custody disputes, Judy Burger has the experience to handle sophisticated cases.

Judy’s approach balances strong advocacy with practical problem-solving. She understands that while some divorces require aggressive litigation to protect clients’ interests, others benefit from collaborative approaches or mediation that reduce conflict and costs. She’ll help you understand your options, develop a strategic approach tailored to your circumstances, and work toward outcomes that protect your financial security and family relationships.

Frequently Asked Questions About California Divorce

How long does a California divorce take?

California requires a minimum six-month waiting period from when divorce papers are served until the divorce can be finalized. However, the actual timeline depends on case complexity and whether spouses agree on key issues. Uncontested divorces may conclude shortly after the six-month minimum, while contested divorces involving complex assets or custody disputes can take 12-18 months or longer.

What’s the difference between legal separation and divorce in California?

Legal separation addresses the same issues as divorce—property division, support, and custody—but spouses remain legally married. Some couples choose separation for religious reasons, to maintain health insurance benefits, or because they’re unsure about divorce. You can convert a legal separation to divorce later, and the six-month waiting period applies to divorce but not separation.

Do I need to prove fault to get divorced in California?

No. California is a no-fault divorce state, meaning you don’t need to prove wrongdoing to divorce. You simply need to state that you have “irreconcilable differences” that have caused the irretrievable breakdown of the marriage. While fault doesn’t determine whether you can divorce, it may impact issues like spousal support in cases involving domestic violence or extreme misconduct.

How is property divided in a California divorce?

California is a community property state, meaning assets and debts acquired during marriage are generally divided equally between spouses. Separate property—assets owned before marriage or received as gifts or inheritance—typically remains with the original owner. However, determining what’s community versus separate property can be complex, especially with commingled assets or businesses.

Can I get spousal support in my California divorce?

Spousal support (alimony) depends on factors including the length of the marriage, each spouse’s income and earning capacity, age and health, the standard of living during the marriage, and contributions to the other spouse’s education or career. Support isn’t automatic, but longer marriages where one spouse sacrificed career advancement often result in support awards. The amount and duration vary based on specific circumstances.

Take the First Step Toward Your Future

If you’re questioning whether it’s time for divorce, you deserve experienced, compassionate legal guidance to understand your options and rights. The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger provides the expertise and support you need during this challenging transition.

Contact Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger today to schedule a confidential consultation. With offices throughout California, we’re ready to listen to your concerns, answer your questions, and help you make informed decisions about your future.

Call us or visit our website to take the first step toward clarity and a new chapter in your life.

California Divorce, Debt, Mediation, Property Division

Ongoing Financial Obligations During a Divorce

December 8, 2025 TRIWriter

Divorce is rarely simple, and one of the most challenging aspects is managing ongoing financial obligations while your case works its way through the legal system. In California, divorce proceedings can take months or even years to finalize, and during that time, bills don’t stop coming. Mortgages, car payments, credit cards, and children’s expenses continue to demand attention, often creating stress and conflict between separating spouses.

Common Ongoing Financial Obligations

Understanding how to handle these shared financial responsibilities during divorce is crucial for protecting your credit, maintaining stability for your children, and positioning yourself for a fair settlement. At The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, we help clients navigate these complex financial waters with clarity and strategic planning.

Mortgage and Housing Costs

For most couples, the family home represents their largest shared financial obligation. During a divorce, questions arise about who should pay the mortgage, property taxes, homeowners’ insurance, and maintenance costs. If one spouse moves out, should they still contribute? What happens if the remaining spouse can’t afford the full payment alone? These questions become even more complicated when home equity is a significant marital asset that will eventually be divided.

Credit Card Debt

Credit cards opened during marriage are typically considered community debt in California, regardless of whose name appears on the account. During divorce proceedings, new charges may accumulate, and existing balances may continue to accrue interest. Disputes often arise about who should pay for which cards, especially when one spouse believes the other is spending irresponsibly.

Auto Loans and Leases

Vehicle payments present unique challenges when spouses separate. The person driving the car isn’t always the person whose name is on the loan. If you’re making payments on a vehicle your spouse is using, or vice versa, this creates an ongoing source of financial tension and potential leverage in negotiations.

Children’s Expenses

Even before formal child support orders are established, children need food, clothing, medical care, childcare, and educational expenses. Parents must figure out how to share these costs fairly while living separately, often with reduced household incomes due to the expenses of maintaining two homes.

Utilities and Services

Phone plans, internet, streaming services, insurance policies, and utility bills often remain in one person’s name while both spouses are benefiting from them. Separating these accounts and determining who pays what during the divorce process requires careful coordination.

Spousal Support Obligations

In some cases, temporary spousal support may be ordered while the divorce is pending, creating a new financial obligation that must be met regardless of other financial pressures.

How Ongoing Financial Obligations Complicate Divorce

How can these expenses complicate matters if not handled properly?

Credit Score Impact

When financial obligations aren’t met during divorce, both spouses’ credit scores can suffer, even if only one person stopped making payments. A joint mortgage or credit card in both names means both parties are legally responsible, and missed payments appear on both credit reports.

Leverage and Power Imbalances

The spouse who controls the finances or earns more income may have significant leverage during divorce negotiations. They might threaten to stop paying certain obligations to pressure the other spouse into accepting unfavorable terms.

Documentation Challenges

Tracking who paid what during the separation period becomes critical for property division and reimbursement claims. Without clear records, disputes arise about whether certain payments should be credited against the final settlement.

Emotional Decision-Making

Financial stress during divorce often leads to poor decisions made out of anger, fear, or desperation. One spouse might max out credit cards, stop paying bills out of spite, or make large purchases to “get their share” before assets are divided.

Temporary Orders Delays

It can take weeks or months to get temporary orders in place addressing financial obligations. During this gap, couples must somehow figure out payment arrangements on their own, often without clear legal guidance.

Practical Advice for Managing Financial Obligations

Attorney Judy Burger has vast experience helping divorcing couples through these murky financial waters. Here are her top recommendations:

Document Everything: Keep meticulous records of every payment you make, including screenshots, bank statements, and receipts. Note the date, amount, and purpose of each payment. This documentation protects you if disputes arise over who paid what during the divorce.
Communicate in Writing: Discuss financial matters with your spouse via email or text message whenever possible. Written communication creates a clear record and reduces misunderstandings about payment agreements.
Open Separate Accounts Immediately: If you haven’t already, open individual bank accounts and credit cards in your name only. Begin redirecting your income to your separate account. This prevents your spouse from accessing or depleting funds you’ll need for living expenses and legal fees.
Request Temporary Orders Quickly: Don’t wait to seek temporary orders addressing financial obligations. These court orders can establish who pays what during the divorce process, providing structure and legal enforceability. Temporary support orders can also be established to help the lower-earning spouse meet basic needs.
Continue Making Agreed-Upon Payments: Even if you’re angry with your spouse, continue making payments on joint obligations where possible. Defaulting on mortgages or loans hurts both of you and can complicate property division. Your attorney can seek reimbursement for payments you made on your spouse’s behalf.
Prioritize Secured Debt: If you must choose which bills to pay, prioritize secured debts like mortgages and car loans. Defaulting on these can result in foreclosure or repossession, creating far more serious problems than late credit card payments.
Consider Mediation for Financial Disputes: If you and your spouse can’t agree on how to handle ongoing obligations, mediation may help you reach temporary agreements without costly court battles.

How Judy Burger Can Help

As a California Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy L. Burger has dedicated her practice to helping clients through the financial complexities of divorce. This certification, held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, reflects advanced knowledge and proven experience in family law matters.

Judy can help you obtain temporary orders quickly to establish clear financial obligations during your divorce. She’ll work to protect your credit and financial interests while building a strong case for fair property division. Her team can help you gather and organize financial documentation, identify hidden assets or debts, and develop strategies for managing obligations during the divorce process.

Whether through negotiation, mediation, or litigation, Judy Burger provides skilled representation focused on achieving outcomes that protect your financial future.

Divorce and Finances FAQs

Am I responsible for debts my spouse incurs after we separate?

In California, debts incurred after the date of separation are generally considered separate debt, belonging only to the spouse who incurred them. However, establishing the exact separation date can be complex, and some exceptions apply. Proper legal guidance is essential.

Can I stop paying the mortgage if I move out of the family home?

This depends on several factors, including who is named on the mortgage and what temporary orders are in place. Stopping payment can damage your credit and affect property division. Consult with an attorney before making this decision.

What happens if my spouse empties our joint bank account?

California law requires full financial disclosure and prohibits dissipating marital assets. If your spouse empties accounts, you may be entitled to reimbursement. Document the withdrawal and contact an attorney immediately.

How quickly can I get temporary spousal support?

Temporary support orders can typically be obtained within a few weeks to a couple of months of filing a request with the court. The timeline depends on court scheduling and whether your spouse contests the request.

Should we file taxes jointly during our divorce?

This depends on your specific situation. Filing jointly may provide tax benefits, but it also creates joint liability. Your attorney and tax professional should review your circumstances before you decide.

Protect Your Financial Future Today

Navigating financial obligations during divorce requires strategic planning and knowledgeable legal guidance. Don’t face these challenges alone or make costly mistakes that could affect your financial security for years to come.

Contact The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger today to schedule a consultation. With offices throughout California, Judy Burger and her team are ready to help you protect your interests and achieve a fair resolution. Call now to discuss your situation and learn how we can help you move forward with confidence and financial stability.

Child Custody

Shared Custody Tips for Managing the Holidays

December 1, 2025 TRIWriter

The holiday season should be a time of joy and celebration for children, but for divorced or separated parents, it can become a source of stress and conflict. Whether it’s Thanksgiving, winter holidays, spring break, or summer vacations, navigating shared custody during special occasions requires careful planning, clear communication, and a commitment to prioritizing your children’s needs.

At The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, we understand the complexities of shared custody arrangements in California. As a Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy Burger has helped countless families create workable holiday schedules that prioritize children’s well-being while respecting both parents’ rights to meaningful time with their kids.

Common Holiday Custody Challenges

Holiday custody disputes are among the most emotionally charged issues facing separated parents. Understanding these common problems can help you avoid them before they escalate.

Last-Minute Schedule Changes

One parent may attempt to alter agreed-upon plans without adequate notice, leaving the other parent scrambling to adjust their holiday preparations. This creates unnecessary tension and disappoints children who were looking forward to specific celebrations.

Conflicting Family Traditions

Each parent may have strong feelings about maintaining family traditions, from specific holiday meals to religious observances. When these traditions conflict with the custody schedule, resentment can build quickly.

Extended Family Expectations

Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other relatives often have their own expectations about seeing the children during holidays. Managing these relationships while honoring custody agreements adds another layer of complexity.

Travel Complications

Holiday travel plans can clash with custody schedules, especially when one parent wants to take children out of state or abroad. Without clear guidelines in your custody order, these situations can lead to serious disputes.

Unequal Holiday Distribution

Parents may feel the division of holidays is unfair, particularly when major celebrations fall close together or when alternating years means missing important milestones.

Actionable Tips for Successful Holiday Co-Parenting in Shared Custody

Here are some steps you can take before every holiday to help things go smoothly:

Plan Well in Advance: Review your custody agreement at least two to three months before major holidays. Mark all important dates on a shared calendar and discuss any potential conflicts early. This gives both parents time to make arrangements and reduces the likelihood of misunderstandings.
Communicate in Writing: Use email, text, or co-parenting apps to document all holiday arrangements. Written communication creates a clear record of agreements and helps prevent “he said, she said” disputes. Keep your messages focused on logistics and the children’s best interests.
Be Flexible and Willing to Negotiate: Life doesn’t always follow the custody schedule to the letter. If your co-parent requests a reasonable schedule swap, consider accommodating them when possible. This goodwill often comes back around when you need flexibility yourself.
Focus on the Children’s Experience: Remember that holidays are about creating positive memories for your children, not winning time with them. Avoid speaking negatively about your co-parent, and encourage your children to enjoy their time with both families.
Create New Traditions: You don’t have to celebrate every holiday on the exact date. If your children spend Thanksgiving Day with their other parent, create a special “Thanksgiving weekend” celebration with your extended family. Children can adapt to new traditions more easily than adults.
Respect the Custody Order: Your custody agreement is a legal document. Even if you disagree with certain provisions, following the order demonstrates respect for the legal process and sets a positive example for your children. If the current arrangement truly isn’t working, seek legal modification rather than unilaterally changing plans.
Keep Extended Family Informed: Share your custody schedule with grandparents and other relatives early. This helps them plan their own gatherings around when the children will be available and reduces pressure on you to violate custody agreements.
Prepare for Travel Properly: If your custody order requires notification or consent for travel, provide proper documentation well in advance. Share travel itineraries, contact information, and accommodation details with your co-parent. This transparency builds trust and ensures everyone knows how to reach the children if needed.
Consider the Children’s Preferences: As children get older, their own wishes about holiday time become increasingly important. While you shouldn’t burden them with making custody decisions, listening to their feelings can help you create arrangements that work better for everyone.
Document Everything: Keep records of holiday exchanges, communications about schedule changes, and any agreements you reach outside the formal custody order. This documentation can be valuable if disputes arise or if you need to modify your custody arrangement.

How Judy Burger Can Help

Navigating holiday custody doesn’t have to be overwhelming. As a California Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy L. Burger brings extensive experience and specialized knowledge to custody matters. This certification, held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, demonstrates her advanced knowledge and commitment to this complex area of law.

Judy can help you create comprehensive custody agreements that address holiday schedules in detail, reducing ambiguity and future conflicts. If your current arrangement isn’t working, she can guide you through the modification process. For parents facing custody disputes, Judy provides skilled representation that prioritizes your children’s best interests while protecting your parental rights.

Child Custody FAQs

Can I modify our holiday custody schedule if it’s not working?

Yes, you can request a modification if you can demonstrate a change in circumstances. The court will consider what arrangement serves the children’s best interests. Working with an experienced family law attorney increases your chances of a successful modification.

What happens if my co-parent violates our holiday custody order?

Violations of custody orders can have serious legal consequences. Document the violation and consult with a family law attorney about your options, which may include filing a motion for contempt or requesting a modification.

Do teenagers get to choose which parent they spend holidays with?

While California courts consider children’s preferences, especially as they mature, the final decision rests with the court based on the child’s best interests. Typically, children aged 14 and older have more input, but they don’t have absolute choice.

How far in advance must I notify my co-parent about holiday travel plans?

This depends on your specific custody order. Many agreements require 30 to 60 days’ notice for out-of-state travel. Always review your order and provide as much advance notice as possible.

What if we can’t agree on how to split the holidays?

If you cannot reach an agreement through negotiation or mediation, the court will decide based on the children’s best interests. Having experienced legal representation ensures your position is effectively presented.

Take the Next Step with Shared Custody Assistance

Don’t let holiday custody stress overshadow what should be joyful times with your children. Whether you need help creating a workable shared custody schedule, modifying an existing order, or resolving a custody dispute, The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger is here to help.

Contact us today for a consultation. With offices throughout California and a commitment to personalized service, Judy Burger and her team will provide the guidance you need to navigate custody challenges successfully. Call now to schedule your appointment and take the first step toward peaceful, child-focused holiday celebrations for years to come.

California Divorce, Property Division, Property Division

How Can Retirement Benefits Complicate a CA Divorce Property Division?

November 4, 2025 TRIWriter

Divorce can be one of the most challenging experiences a person can face, not only emotionally but also logistically and financially. One of the most complex aspects of a divorce in California is the property division, particularly when it comes to retirement benefits. Understanding how California law governs property division, as well as the specific complexities associated with retirement accounts, is crucial for anyone navigating this difficult terrain.

Understanding California Property Division Laws

California is a community property state. This means that, generally speaking, any property or earnings acquired during the marriage are considered joint property, which must be divided equitably upon divorce. However, this seemingly straightforward rule becomes significantly more complicated when it comes to assets such as retirement benefits.

Retirement benefits often represent a substantial portion of a couple’s total assets and can significantly impact the outcome of property division. The following types of retirement benefits are commonly encountered in a divorce:

Pension Plans: These are often employer-funded retirement plans that promise a specific payout upon retirement, contingent upon factors such as years of service and salary.
401(k) Plans: These employee-established savings plans allow workers to save for retirement with tax benefits, often featuring employer matching contributions.
IRA Accounts: Individual Retirement Accounts can be traditional or Roth, each with unique tax implications and rules regarding withdrawals and transfers.
Profit-Sharing Plans: These are retirement savings plans in which an employer contributes a portion of the company’s profits to employee accounts, often based on a predetermined formula.
Employee Stock Ownership Plans (ESOPs): These are retirement plans that provide workers with ownership interests in the company by allocating shares.
Defined Benefit Plans: These employer-sponsored retirement plans provide a predetermined monthly income to retirees based on factors such as salary history and years of service.

Contributions made to a retirement account and the service credits accrued from the date of marriage until the date of separation are considered community property. The non-participating spouse is entitled to an equal share of this portion.

The Complexity of Dividing Retirement Benefits

The division of retirement benefits in a California divorce can be particularly intricate for several reasons:

Valuation: Unlike more straightforward assets, the value of retirement benefits isn’t always apparent. Pensions must be actuarially calculated to determine their present value, a process that requires specialized insight and expertise.
Types of Accounts: Different types of retirement accounts have varying rules for withdrawals and distributions. For instance, early withdrawals might incur significant tax penalties. Therefore, understanding the mechanics of these accounts becomes vital.
Qualified Domestic Relations Orders (QDROs): For certain retirement plans, a QDRO must be drafted and approved by the court to allow for the tax-free division of retirement benefits. This legal order can be complex and requires the expertise of an attorney to execute properly.
Post-Divorce Considerations: Retirement benefits may continue to grow even after the divorce is finalized, further complicating matters. Understanding how and when to divide these benefits can impact the long-term financial stability of both parties.
Negotiating Settlements: Spouses may choose to negotiate the division of retirement assets rather than leaving it strictly to the court’s decision. This requires careful consideration of both current and future financial needs, adding complexity to the negotiation process.

How Judy Burger Can Help

Navigating the nuances of retirement benefits in divorce requires a skilled attorney with expertise in California family law. As a California Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy L. Burger possesses the knowledge and experience necessary to guide clients through the complex landscape of property division.

Judy’s approach is comprehensive and client-focused. She prioritizes understanding her clients’ individual circumstances, ensuring that each client feels heard and supported throughout the legal process. With her extensive understanding of retirement benefits, Judy is proficient at negotiating favorable outcomes for her clients, protecting their rights and interests.

Judy has long-standing relationships with forensic accountants who understand family law and draft QDROS to ensure that the division of retirement benefits occurs without unnecessary taxes or penalties. Judy is dedicated to providing clarity amid confusion, enabling her clients to move forward with confidence after divorce.

Retirement Benefits Property Division FAQs

Are retirement accounts divided equally in a California divorce?

Yes, as a community property state, California generally mandates an equitable division of retirement accounts accrued during the marriage, although certain factors may influence the final distribution.

What is a QDRO, and why do I need one?

A Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) is a legal order that allows for the division of certain retirement plans without incurring tax penalties. It’s necessary for administering the division of retirement accounts, such as pensions or 401(k) plans.

Can I access my ex-spouse’s retirement benefits after a divorce?

If a QDRO has been established, you may have the right to access a portion of your ex-spouse’s retirement benefits. It is essential to follow the terms outlined in the QDRO.

What happens if my spouse had a retirement account before we got married?

Only the portion of the retirement account that accrued during the marriage is typically considered community property. The value at the time of marriage is often viewed as separate property.

How can I ensure I receive my fair share of retirement benefits in a divorce?

Engaging a qualified family law attorney, like Judy L. Burger, is critical. She will help you understand the value of the retirement benefits involved and negotiate a fair outcome based on your specific situation.

Protect Your Retirement Benefits in a Property Division

Handling retirement benefits during divorce can be a daunting task, but with the right guidance, the process can be manageable. Understanding California’s community property laws and the nature of retirement accounts is essential. Having an experienced attorney like Judy L. Burger by your side can make all the difference in securing your financial future post-divorce. Don’t hesitate to contact her office for guidance tailored to your specific situation.

Property Division

Confirming Separate Assets in a CA Property Division

October 31, 2025 TRIWriter

Dividing property in a divorce can be complicated. In California, property division is governed by community property laws, which dictate how assets and debts acquired during the marriage are handled. However, distinguishing between separate assets and community assets is critical for ensuring an equitable division. Understanding these concepts can significantly impact the final agreement at the time of divorce.

Let’s review what constitutes separate assets, guidelines for determining them, and how experienced CA Family Law Attorney Judy Burger can assist you through the property division process.

What Are Separate Assets?

In California, separate assets refer to property owned by one spouse that was acquired before the marriage or through certain means during the marriage. Examples of separate assets include:

Property Owned Before Marriage: Any real estate, investments, or personal property that one spouse owned prior to the marriage is considered a separate asset.
Gifts and Inheritances: If a spouse receives a gift or inheritance from someone other than their partner, this property is likely to be classified as separate.
Certain Personal Injury Awards: Compensation received for personal injury claims, not including lost wages during the marriage, is considered separate.
Property Acquired with Separate Funds: If one spouse uses their separate funds to acquire additional property, that property can remain separate.
Income from Separate Property: Income generated from separate assets, such as rental income from property owned before the marriage, is treated as separate, unless commingled.

Guidelines for Determining Separate Assets

Identifying separate assets amidst community assets can be challenging, and understanding the distinctions is crucial. Here are some guidelines to help confirm separate assets during property division:

Documentation: Maintaining records of asset ownership is essential. This includes deeds, bank statements, and documentation of gifts or inheritances. Clear records can help support claims that certain assets are separate.
Tracing Funds: In cases where separate and community funds have been mixed, it may be necessary to trace the roots of the assets. A financial expert can assist in differentiating community property from separate property by examining account histories and transaction details.
Legal Definitions: Familiarity with California’s legal definitions is vital. California Family Code Section 770 details the characterization of separate property. Consulting legal statutes helps provide clarity on what qualifies as a separate asset.
Marital Agreements: Pre-nuptial or post-nuptial agreements can define the nature of certain assets as separate. If you have a marital agreement in place, it’s essential to review its terms closely.
Community Property Presumption: In California, all assets acquired during the marriage are presumed community property unless proven otherwise. This presumption means that one must provide sufficient evidence to establish the separate character of the asset in question.

How Attorney Judy Burger Can Help

Navigating the complexities of property division requires a knowledgeable and experienced attorney who understands California’s laws. Judy Burger, a Certified Family Law Specialist, has extensive experience in handling property division matters, and her expertise can greatly benefit you in several ways:

Comprehensive Knowledge: With her in-depth understanding of California family law, Judy provides accurate legal advice on asset categorization, ensuring you know which of your assets may qualify as separate property.
Strategic Planning: Each divorce case is unique, and Judy takes time to develop a tailored strategy that considers your situation. She helps clients gather necessary documentation and develop an effective approach to demonstrate their claims over separate assets.
Expert Negotiation: Judy’s practice involves negotiating terms that can lead to a fair settlement. Her skilled negotiation techniques can help resolve disputes over property division without the need for lengthy court interventions.
Litigation Experience: If negotiations fail and your case goes to court, Judy’s litigation skills come into play. Her familiarity with court procedures and effective advocacy can yield better outcomes in asset division disputes.
Resource Networking: Beyond legal assistance, Judy has a network of financial experts and appraisers. This collaboration can enhance your case in terms of valuing assets accurately and proving their separate nature.

FAQs About Separate Assets

What is the difference between separate and community property in California?

Community property refers to assets obtained during the marriage, while separate property belongs solely to one spouse, often acquired before marriage or through gifts and inheritances.

How can I prove that an asset is separate?

Proof usually involves providing documentation showing ownership before the marriage or demonstrating that it was received as a gift or inheritance. Tracing funds can also establish separation.

Can my spouse claim my separate assets?

Generally, no. However, if separate assets are commingled with community assets, it may be more challenging to prove they remain separate.

Is income earned from separate property considered separate?

Yes, unless the income has been significantly invested into community property, in which case it may complicate the distinction.

What role does a prenuptial agreement play in separate assets?

A prenup can clearly define certain assets as separate, helping to protect them during a divorce. If you have a prenup, it is essential to review its terms with an attorney.

Experienced CA Property Division Lawyer

Understanding separate assets and their distinction from community property is crucial when navigating a divorce in California. Having an experienced attorney like Judy L. Burger by your side can ensure you receive the guidance necessary to protect your rights and your assets. With her expertise, personalized approach, and negotiation skills, you can work towards achieving a fair division that respects both your interests and those of your family.

If you’re facing a divorce, contact The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger today for a consultation to discuss your property division concerns.

California Divorce, Debt, Property Division

What Are the Nuances of “Graying Divorce?”

October 17, 2025 TRIWriter

As life expectancy continues to increase, more couples in their 50s and beyond are finding themselves contemplating divorce. Dubbed “graying divorce,” this trend highlights a unique segment of divorcing couples, whose legal and emotional challenges often differ significantly from those faced by younger individuals. For those navigating this complex process in California, the guidance of a skilled attorney can make a tremendous difference.

What Is Graying Divorce?

Graying divorce refers to the phenomenon of older couples, typically those over the age of 50, seeking divorce after many years, or even decades, of marriage. According to statistics from the National Center for Family & Marriage Research, this trend has been steadily increasing since the 1990s. Often, these couples face a host of issues that can complicate the dissolution of their marriage.

Unique Challenges of Graying Divorce

What makes graying divorce more challenging?

Division of Assets: Unlike younger couples, graying couples often have more substantial assets, including retirement accounts, pension plans, real estate, and other investments. Determining the equitable distribution of these assets can be complex, especially if one spouse is nearing retirement or if there are significant changes in asset values due to market fluctuations.
Retirement Plans: Many older couples have built their financial security on joint retirement plans. In a gray divorce, considerations regarding Social Security benefits, pension plans, and retirement accounts become incredibly important. It is crucial to fully understand how dividing these assets may impact future financial stability and retirement plans.
Health Issues and Care Needs: As individuals age, health concerns may arise that can significantly impact divorce proceedings. Issues such as long-term care requirements or medical expenses must be factored into asset division and alimony discussions, as one spouse may require more financial support if they have chronic health conditions.
Spousal Support (Alimony): The support that one spouse may provide to another post-divorce can differ greatly for older couples. Unlike younger couples, the duration and amount of spousal support can become contentious, particularly if one spouse knows they may not have the time to increase their earning potential due to age or health issues.
Emotional and Psychological Impact: Older couples may already have deep-rooted emotional connections and shared histories that make the process of separation particularly painful. Additionally, the fear of loneliness, financial insecurity, and anxiety about starting over in later life can create emotional turmoil that affects both parties.

How Judy Burger Can Help

At The Law Offices of July L. Burger, we recognize the unique challenges that graying divorce presents. Our team is dedicated to providing tailored legal support that addresses the specific needs of our clients. We understand that this stage of life comes with its own set of concerns, and we work diligently to ensure that our clients navigate the process smoothly and with clarity.

Thorough Asset Evaluation: We provide comprehensive evaluations of marital assets, ensuring all possessions are accounted for and fairly valued. Our expertise enables clients to understand their rights regarding retirement benefits and other complex financial matters.
Advising on Retirement Implications: Judy Burger is well-versed in the intricacies of how divorce affects retirement plans and Social Security benefits. We will help you analyze your options, helping ensure you maintain financial security in your later years.
Emotional Support Resources: During this challenging time, we recognize the emotional burden our clients bear. We can offer resources and referrals to counseling services to support you through this difficult transition.
Negotiation of Spousal Support: Our firm will advocate for your best interests in negotiating any spousal support arrangements, focusing on the long-term financial stability of our clients post-divorce.
Mediation and Settlement Options: Recognizing that not every divorce must go to court, we explore alternative dispute resolution options, including mediation, to reduce the strain of adversarial proceedings.

FAQs About Graying Divorce

What constitutes a “graying divorce?”

A graying divorce typically involves couples over the age of 50 seeking divorce after a long-term marriage, often with complex financial and emotional circumstances.

How does asset division differ in a graying divorce?

Older couples typically have more substantial and diverse assets, including retirement accounts, pensions, and real estate, which necessitate careful evaluation and equitable distribution.

What should I consider regarding spousal support?

Factors such as the duration of the marriage, discrimination in earning potential due to age, health issues, and the financial needs of both spouses will influence spousal support agreements.

How do retirement benefits factor into a graying divorce?

Retirement benefits are a major consideration, as dividing them can impact your long-term financial security. It’s essential to work with an attorney who understands the intricacies of retirement benefits in divorce.

Can mediation be effective in graying divorces?

Yes, mediation can be a fruitful alternative to traditional court proceedings, allowing for a more amicable resolution that can save time, money, and emotional turmoil.

Certified CA Family Law Specialist for Graying Divorce

Graying divorce is a significant reality for many couples opting to part ways later in life. With the right legal guidance, such as that offered by The Law Offices of July L. Burger, individuals can navigate the complexities of this process with confidence.

Whether you’re just considering the possibility of divorce or already in the midst of proceedings, having knowledgeable support by your side can make all the difference.

California Divorce

How Can a Certified CA Family Law Specialist Help Me When Divorcing with Children?

October 10, 2025 TRIWriter

Divorce can be an emotionally taxing and complex journey, especially when children are involved. Navigating the legal and emotional complexities of family law requires expertise and compassion. Certified California Family Law Specialist Judy Burger possesses the necessary qualifications and experience to guide families through this difficult process, aiming for the best possible outcomes for both parents and children.

The Complexities of Divorcing with Children

Divorce brings a myriad of challenges, but the presence of children introduces even greater complexity. Parents may face disputes over child custody, visitation rights, child support, and the overall well-being of their children.

In California, family law emphasizes the importance of the child’s best interests, making it essential for parents to prioritize their needs amid the emotional turmoil.

Custody Battles: Determining where the child will live and how much time they will spend with each parent can lead to contentious disputes. California recognizes two types of custody: legal custody (decision-making rights) and physical custody (where the child lives). The complexities involved in these arrangements require careful consideration of the child’s needs and the parents’ capabilities.
Child Support: Parents are usually obligated to provide financial support for their children, and calculating child support can be a complicated process. Factors such as each parent’s income, the child’s needs, and additional expenses, including healthcare and education, must be considered.
Emotional Impact: Beyond the legalities, divorce profoundly affects children’s emotional health. Maintaining stability and continuity in their lives is crucial, requiring parents to approach the situation with sensitivity and care.
Parental Alienation: In high-conflict divorces, one parent may inadvertently or deliberately try to alienate the child from the other parent. A family law specialist can help mediate these situations to foster healthy relationships and ensure that the child’s welfare is prioritized.
Co-Parenting Arrangements: Establishing a workable co-parenting plan is vital for the children’s stability. This involves clear communication, mutual respect, and frameworks that accommodate both parents’ schedules and responsibilities.

How a Certified CA Family Law Specialist Can Help

A Certified California Family Law Specialist like Judy Burger brings a wealth of knowledge and experience specifically tailored to handling cases involving children. Here are some ways in which her expertise can be invaluable during a divorce:

In-Depth Knowledge of Family Law: Judy Burger’s certification indicates a high level of proficiency and comprehensive understanding of family law in California. She is well-versed in the intricacies of custody arrangements, child support calculations, and the latest legal precedents. This expertise allows her to provide sound legal advice and strategies tailored to her clients’ unique situations.
Personalized Approach: Every family’s situation is different. Judy takes the time to understand your family’s dynamics, the emotional needs of your children, and your goals as a parent. This personalized approach helps to create a legal strategy that focuses on the best interests of the children while also supporting parental rights.
Conflict Resolution Skills: Divorce often comes with high emotions that can complicate negotiations. A Certified Specialist like Judy can help mediate disputes and facilitate constructive dialogue between parents, focusing on collaborative solutions that minimize conflict and prioritize the children’s welfare.
Resources and Support: Navigating a divorce is not just a legal process; it’s an emotional journey. Judy Burger can provide resources or recommend counseling services to help both parents and children navigate this transition.
Court Representation: If your case goes to court, having a knowledgeable attorney by your side is crucial. With experience in courtroom procedures and litigation strategies, Judy can represent your interests effectively, advocating for custody arrangements and support terms that align with your children’s best interests.

FAQs About Divorcing with Children

Here are five frequently asked questions (FAQs) concerning divorce when children are involved:

How is child custody determined?

Child custody is determined based on the child’s best interests. Factors considered include the child’s age, health, emotional ties with each parent, and the parents’ ability to provide care and a stable environment. Courts prefer arrangements that allow children to maintain relationships with both parents.

What if my spouse and I can’t agree on custody?

If parents cannot reach an agreement regarding custody, the court will intervene. It may be necessary to mediate to help parents reach a mutually agreeable solution. If mediation fails, the case will be taken to court, where a judge will make the final custody determination.

How is child support calculated in California?

Child support in California is calculated using California’s statewide formula that takes into account both parents’ incomes, the time each parent spends with the child, tax deductions, and healthcare expenses. The goal is to ensure the child receives sufficient financial support from both parents.

Can I relocate with my child after the divorce?

Moving with a child post-divorce typically requires approval from the other parent or court permission. Courts assess the reasons for the move and its impact on the child’s relationship with the non-moving parent and overall stability.

What should I do if I suspect parental alienation?

If you suspect that your child is being alienated from you, addressing the issue promptly is crucial. Document any instances of alienation and consult a family law specialist who can provide legal advice and mediation services to address and rectify the situation.

Choose a Certified CA Family Law Specialist

Divorce is undoubtedly a challenging experience, especially when children are involved. However, with the guidance of a Certified California Family Law Specialist like Judy Burger, families can navigate this turbulent time more effectively. Leveraging her expertise ensures that parents can focus on what truly matters—the well-being of their children—while moving toward a brighter future for their family.

If you’re facing a divorce with children, consider reaching out to The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger for professional support and guidance tailored to your unique situation.

California Divorce

What Can I Expect In a Litigated Divorce?

October 3, 2025 TRIWriter

Navigating the turbulent waters of divorce can be overwhelming, particularly when the process involves litigation. A litigated divorce is often necessary when couples cannot come to an agreement on critical issues such as asset division, child custody, or support payments. If you find yourself in this situation, knowing what to expect can help mitigate some of the anxiety and uncertainty. This blog post will cover when a litigated divorce is necessary, the basic process involved, the expected timeframe, potential costs, and how a Certified Family Law Specialist like Judy Burger can represent you effectively.

When is a Litigated Divorce Necessary?

While many divorces are resolved through amicable negotiations or mediation, a litigated divorce becomes necessary in certain circumstances, including:

Irreconcilable Differences: When one or both parties are unwilling to compromise on key issues like child custody, division of assets, or spousal support.
Domestic Abuse: In cases where one party is facing domestic violence or abuse, legal intervention often becomes essential for protection.
Complex Financial Situations: If significant assets, business interests, or debts are involved, litigating the divorce can ensure a fair evaluation and settlement.
Parental Alienation or Uncooperative Co-Parenting: When one parent is attempting to undermine the relationship between the child and the other parent, litigation may be necessary to protect the child’s best interests.

The Basic Process of a Litigated Divorce

The litigated divorce process involves several key steps, typically outlined as follows:

Filing the Petition: The process begins when one spouse files a divorce petition in court. This document outlines the grounds for divorce and requests specific relief regarding custody, support, and property division.
Service of Process: The petition must then be served to the other spouse, signaling the beginning of the legal process.
Response: The responding spouse has a specified period (usually 30 days) to answer the petition, admitting or denying the claims.
Discovery: Both parties engage in the discovery process, which involves sharing financial information, documents, and other relevant evidence. This phase may include written questions (interrogatories), requests for documents, and depositions.
Negotiation and Settlement: Before trial, the parties often attempt to negotiate a settlement. Temporary orders may also be filed regarding custody and support issues during this time.
Trial: If negotiations fail, the case will go to trial. Each party will present its case before a judge, who will make the final decisions based on the evidence presented.
Final Judgment: After the trial, the court issues a final judgment that outlines the terms of the divorce, including asset division, custody arrangements, and support payments.

Timeframe for a Litigated Divorce

The timeframe for a litigated divorce can vary significantly based on several factors, including court schedules, the complexity of the case, and the parties’ willingness to negotiate. Generally, here are some timelines to consider:

Initial Filing to Response: 30 days for the responding spouse to respond to the petition.
Discovery Phase: This can take several months, depending on the amount of information exchanged and any challenges that arise.
Negotiation Phase: If negotiations are productive, they may take weeks. However, prolonged disputes can significantly extend this phase.
Trial Preparations: If the case goes to trial, preparation can take an additional few months.
Trial Duration: Trials can last anywhere from one day to several weeks, depending on the complexity of the issues at hand.

Basically, a litigated divorce can take anywhere from several months to a year or more.

Potential Costs of a Litigated Divorce

The financial implications of a litigated divorce can be substantial. While every case is unique, costs may include:

Attorney Fees
Court Fees
Expert Fees
Discovery Costs

In total, litigated divorces may cost anywhere from a few thousand to tens of thousands of dollars, depending on various factors.

The Right Legal Representation Is Critical

Having an experienced California Certified Family Law Specialist like Judy Burger on your side can make a dramatic difference in the outcome of your litigated divorce. Here’s how:

In-Depth Knowledge: Judy Burger possesses comprehensive knowledge of California family law, ensuring that all legal nuances are thoroughly addressed.
Strategic Guidance: With her expertise, Judy can help you develop effective strategies for negotiation and litigation, ensuring your interests are prioritized.
Negotiation Skills: In a litigated divorce, strong negotiation skills are crucial. Judy will advocate on your behalf, aiming for a fair resolution.
Conflict Resolution: When disputes arise, having a knowledgeable attorney to mediate can help de-escalate tensions and facilitate solutions.
Protecting Your Rights: Judy Burger will work to ensure that your rights are protected during the entire process, from the initial filing to the final judgment.

FAQs about Litigated Divorce

What are the grounds for divorce in California?

California is a no-fault state, meaning the primary grounds for divorce are irreconcilable differences or incurable insanity.

How long does it take to get a divorce in California?

The minimum process for a divorce to be finalized in California is typically six months; however, litigated divorces can take longer to complete.

Can I change my mind after filing for divorce?

Yes, you can withdraw your divorce petition before the final judgment is issued; however, this option is not available if the other spouse has already filed a response.

What documents do I need for a litigated divorce?

You’ll need various documents, including the divorce petition, financial disclosures, evidence of income, and any evidence supporting custody claims.

How does custody get decided in a litigated divorce?

Custody is determined based on the best interests of the child, considering various factors like emotional ties, stability, and parental ability.

Partner with a California Certified Family Law Specialist for Your Litigated Divorce

A litigated divorce can be complex and emotionally taxing, but understanding the entire process, potential costs, and timeframe can help alleviate stress. Partnering with a knowledgeable attorney like Judy Burger ensures that your rights and interests are effectively represented throughout the process, leading to a resolution that prioritizes both your well-being and that of any children involved.

An opposing legal counsel has this to say:

“Judy is a passionate advocate for her clients and a force to be reckoned with in the Courtroom. She has the perfect blend of aggressiveness when needed and subtlety when appropriate.”

That is who you want representing you and protecting your interests. If you are facing a litigated divorce, reach out to The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger for expert guidance and support.

California Divorce, Child Custody

When Can My Child Choose Who to Live With After a Divorce?

September 26, 2025 TRIWriter

Divorce is a challenging life event, and when children are involved, it can become even more complicated. One of the most common questions parents ask is, “When can my child choose which parent to live with after a divorce?” Understanding California law regarding this matter, as well as the emotional nuances involved, can help parents navigate this difficult terrain more effectively.

California Law on Children’s Choice of Custody

In California, the law does not specify a particular age at which a child can choose which parent to live with after a divorce. However, California Family Code, Family Division 8, Part 2, Chapter 2, Section 3042 provides some clarity on the matter. This section states that if a child is of sufficient age and capacity to reason, the court may consider the child’s preferences regarding custody and visitation. Typically, this means that children as young as 14 can express their desires, but courts will often consider the opinions of younger children as well, depending on their maturity and understanding.

The family court has the discretion to decide whether the child’s preference will significantly impact the custody determination. While a child’s wishes can be a critical factor in the court’s decision, the ultimate goal remains the best interest of the child—a principle that guides all custody arrangements in California.

Challenges Parents Face When Children Can Choose

When children are allowed to express their preferences regarding custody, several challenges may arise for parents:

Emotional Strain: Children may feel torn between both parents, fearing they will hurt one parent’s feelings by choosing the other. This emotional burden can lead to anxiety and behavioral issues in children.
Manipulation and External Influences: Younger children or those who may not fully understand the implications of their choices can be susceptible to undue influence from one parent or external parties (like friends or relatives). This can lead to perceptions of favoritism or bias, causing discord between parents.
Confusion and Mixed Signals: Allowing children to choose can create confusion, as they may believe their choice holds more weight than it actually does, leading to misunderstandings about their role in the custody decision-making process.
Instability: Children may change their minds, resulting in a lack of stability in their living arrangements. Fluctuating preferences can cause undue stress for both the child and the parents.
Legal Consequences: Parents may feel compelled to comply with their child’s wishes to avoid conflict, which can lead to potential issues with enforcing court orders. Altering custody arrangements based on a child’s preference without legal amendments can create legal complications.

Tips for Parents to Ease the Transition

Navigating custody decisions when children can express preferences requires sensitivity and understanding. Here are some tips for parents:

Maintain Open Communication: Foster an environment where your child feels safe expressing their feelings without fear of judgment. Encourage open conversations about their thoughts and desires regarding where they want to live.
Avoid Manipulation: While it might be tempting to sway your child’s opinion, it is crucial to respect their feelings and encourage them to voice their thoughts honestly, without pressure from either parent.
Educate Your Child: Help your child understand that their choice is important, but must also consider how that choice might impact their overall well-being. Discuss the logistics, routines, and emotional ramifications of living with one parent versus the other.
Seek Professional Help: Engaging a child psychologist or counselor can help your child process their feelings about the divorce. These professionals can also provide you with strategies to ease the transition and support your child’s emotional health.
Work with a Family Law Specialist: Consulting with CA Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy L. Burger, can ensure you understand your rights and obligations regarding custody. Legal guidance can also facilitate productive discussions between you and your ex-spouse.

FAQs About Child Custody in California

What factors will the court consider in making custody decisions?

The court will consider several factors, including the child’s age, the emotional bond between the child and each parent, each parent’s ability to provide a stable environment, and any history of domestic violence or substance abuse.

At what age can a child express a preference for custody?

While there is no specific age limit, children aged 14 years and older are generally considered capable of expressing their preferences. Courts may also consider younger children on a case-by-case basis.

Can a parent refuse to let a child see the other parent?

No. Unless there is a court order restricting visitation due to safety concerns, parents must comply with the terms of the custody agreement. If a parent feels that visitation should be limited, they should consult with a lawyer.

How can I modify an existing custody agreement?

To modify a custody agreement, you must file a petition with the family court. Changes must reflect a significant change in circumstances that affects the child’s best interests.

What if my ex-spouse is not following the custody agreement?

If your ex-spouse is not complying with the custody agreement, document specific incidents and reach out to a family law attorney for guidance on how to enforce your rights.

Get Help with Complex Child Custody Matters in California

Navigating child custody after a divorce is complex, and when children can express preferences, it becomes even more critical to ensure that their well-being remains the top priority. Understanding California laws and seeking professional guidance can help parents create a supportive environment for their children during this challenging time.

Family Law Attorney Judy L. Burger can help. She has extensive experience working with families throughout the Golden State to resolve child custody matters in the best interests of children and families. Contact one of our eight offices across California today to schedule a consultation.