social media and your divorce Archives

Social media content, including posts, pictures, comments, and videos, can be used as evidence in child custody cases, potentially impacting your outcome. Careful consideration of your online presence is crucial during a custody battle. California Certified Family Law Specialist Judy L. Burger knows social media’s power and potential impacts, providing significant insight into this challenge.

How Social Media Can Affect Your Child Custody Case

Family court judges put the children’s best interests first when determining custody arrangements. Parental behavior is closely scrutinized. Carrying on as usual by posting anything and everything on your social media accounts is a grave mistake. Your spouse’s attorney will put everything online under the microscope and use it against you. Even deleting posts does not help – screenshots of past messages and posts can come back to haunt you.

Here are some ways social media can negatively impact your child custody case:

Evidence of Parental Fitness: Judges can use social media posts to assess a parent’s character, lifestyle, and ability to provide a stable and safe environment for a child.
Risky Behavior: Pictures or videos showing excessive partying, drug use, or criminal activity can raise concerns about your ability to care for a child.
Negativity and Conflict: Negative comments about the other parent or public sharing of conflicts can be seen as evidence of hostility and a lack of ability to co-parent.
Parenting Style and Values: Your social media presence can reflect your parenting style, values, and involvement in the child’s life.
Child’s Privacy: Violating a child’s privacy by posting excessive photos of them online could lead to negative consequences and be a source of conflict with the other parent.
Inconsistencies and Misrepresentations: Social media posts can be used to prove financial discrepancies or inconsistencies regarding a parent’s claims.
Emotional Impact: Social media during a custody battle can be stressful and add to the emotional burden of the situation.
Harassment: Social media can be used for harassment and cyberstalking. If one parent uses social media to harass, threaten, or intimidate the other parent, this can result in criminal charges.

Remember, social media posts are often accessible to law enforcement, prosecutors, and private investigators without a warrant.

Tips for Managing Social Media During a Custody Case

CA Child Custody Lawyer Judy Burger recommends the following to guide your social media activity during your custody case:

Exercise Caution: Be mindful of what you post, especially regarding your ex-spouse, the child, or lifestyle.
Adjust Privacy Settings: Use your social media platforms’ privacy settings to control who can see your posts and profile information.
Avoid Negative Comments: Refrain from posting negative comments or engaging in public arguments about your ex-spouse.
Be Strategic: If you wish to share photos or information about your children, do so cautiously, focusing on positive interactions and involvement.
Review Posts and Comments: Review your social media activity and be prepared for any negative repercussions or requests for screenshots during the custody case.
Less is More: If you have any doubts about what to share, don’t share anything.

What If My Spouse Uses Social Media Against Me?

If your spouse uses your social media posts against you in a custody battle, it’s a serious situation, but not insurmountable. Focus on demonstrating your ability to co-parent effectively and consult with Attorney Judy Burger to strategize on addressing this issue. Here are some valuable strategies:

Focus on the Facts: Present a case highlighting your positive qualities as a parent and your commitment to the child’s well-being, focusing on facts and evidence rather than emotional arguments.
Turn the Tables: If you have examples of your spouse’s social media posts, especially ones that demonstrate their own issues, you may be able to use them to rebut their claims.
Be Honest and Accountable: Address the social media posts calmly and rationally, explaining the context or clarifying any misunderstandings.

Seek Legal Advice for Child Custody Matters in California

Social media plays a huge role in today’s digital age. Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and other platforms showcase people’s experiences, ideas, daily activities, and even their conflicts. This instantaneous connection with the world can have unintended consequences for your child custody case.

Consult with CA Family Law Attorney Judy Burger to understand how social media can affect your specific case and receive guidance on navigating social media during a custody battle. Contact us online or call one of our eight offices near you to schedule a consultation.

Chris loved posting to all her social media accounts – Facebook, Twitter, Instagram – she had them all. It seemed like innocent fun and a great way to stay connected. The day she posted about her trip to Las Vegas, however, she learned the perils of social media. Her estranged husband learned she was on vacation and not helping her grandmother recover from hip surgery as she stated when she dropped the kids off at his house. At least a few of her 2,372 Facebook friends wondered how she could afford to stay at the Bellagio Las Vegas while claiming she needed more spousal support and child support. Chris found out the hard way that social media and your divorce are not good partners.

Let’s look at several reasons that people in the middle of a divorce should avoid social media.

Hidden Gold

Boasting about buying a new boat while claiming you’re too poor to pay child support is not a smart thing to do – but people do it. Social media posts may be a veritable treasure trove of financial information. Be aware that the parties to a California divorce are required to submit accurate financial disclosures or face penalties. Lying on divorce disclosures violates California law.

Not All “Friends” Are Friends

This may not be the best time to post a picture of you with your new boyfriend or write nasty things about your ex. If your estranged spouse is on the same social media sites, there’s a strong possibility you may have friends in common. Even if you have unfollowed or unfriended your spouse, he or she may still be able to see your posts.

And, of course, there’s always deliberate sabotage. Some friends may be friendlier with your spouse than with you. In addition, people may carelessly share your posts and photos so your ex-spouse will see them.

Posts = Evidence

Most of the messages and photos you posted on social media accounts may be used as evidence in your divorce case. If you are concerned about social media and your divorce, you may be tempted to delete everything. Talk to your attorney before doing anything with your social media accounts. Deactivating your accounts during your divorce may be the best course of action.

Social Media and Your Divorce? Maybe Not a Match Made in Heaven.

If you’re feeling nervous about past posts, you might consider deactivating your account. However, do not delete pics, posts, snaps, tweets, and another other social media stuff without talking to your divorce lawyer first.

Ms. Burger is a California Certified Family Law Specialist and founder of the Law Offices of Judy L. Burger. We assist clients in California’s Northern to Central Coast, including Beverly Hills, San Francisco, Gold River, Santa Barbara, Ventura/Oxnard, and surrounding communities.