In California, our state allows both men and women to change their last names when they get married if one or both of them choose to do so. California is one of only nine states that officially has this equal opportunity law on the books.
A recent incident in Florida brought to light the lingering gender discrimination in other parts of the country. According to news reports, a Florida man was accused of fraud by the state Department of Motor Vehicles after he adopted his wife’s last name following their 2011 marriage.
Lazaro Dinh decided to take his wife’s last name rather than vice versa. Lazaro said he had no emotional ties to his last name and he wanted to help his wife’s Vietnamese family perpetuate their surname. After the wedding, Lazaro followed the usual steps to obtain a new passport and Social Security card. He also changed his bank accounts and credit cards before attempting to obtain a new driver’s license.
Lazaro then applied for a new driver’s license the same way female Floridians do when changing their name after marriage. The Florida DMV issued Lazaro a new license and he went on with life. More than a year later, Lazaro received a letter from Florida’s DMV informing him that his license had been suspended due to an accusation of “obtaining a driving license by fraud”.
He first thought it must be a mistake, but when he called the DMV office in Tallahassee he was told that in order to legally change his name he must do so through a court, a process that takes several months and over $400 in filing fees. When Lazaro explained that his name change was the result of a marriage he was told the rule only applied to women.
Luckily for Lazaro, the Florida DMV decided not to pursue fraud charges at roughly the same time the news hit the internet.
At the Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, we will aggressively pursue the best outcome possible for you in your divorce or custody proceedings. Judy L. Burger is known for her tenacious representation of clients in high conflict cases in and around the San Francisco Bay and Sacramento areas. If you are a parent facing a divorce or custody dispute, call us today to learn more about how we can help. Call (415)293-8314 in the San Francisco Bay area or (916)631-1935 in the Sacramento area, or contact us online via our confidential inquiry form. Can a Man Legally Adopt His Wife’s Last Name When Marrying in California?
In California, our state allows both men and women to change their last names when they get married if one or both of them choose to do so. California is one of only nine states that officially has this equal opportunity law on the books.
A recent incident in Florida brought to light the lingering gender discrimination in other parts of the country. According to news reports, a Florida man was accused of fraud by the state Department of Motor Vehicles after he adopted his wife’s last name following their 2011 marriage.
Lazaro Dinh decided to take his wife’s last name rather than vice versa. Lazaro said he had no emotional ties to his last name and he wanted to help his wife’s Vietnamese family perpetuate their surname. After the wedding, Lazaro followed the usual steps to obtain a new passport and Social Security card. He also changed his bank accounts and credit cards before attempting to obtain a new driver’s license.
Lazaro then applied for a new driver’s license the same way female Floridians do when changing their name after marriage. The Florida DMV issued Lazaro a new license and he went on with life. More than a year later, Lazaro received a letter from Florida’s DMV informing him that his license had been suspended due to an accusation of “obtaining a driving license by fraud”.
He first thought it must be a mistake, but when he called the DMV office in Tallahassee he was told that in order to legally change his name he must do so through a court, a process that takes several months and over $400 in filing fees. When Lazaro explained that his name change was the result of a marriage he was told the rule only applied to women.
Luckily for Lazaro, the Florida DMV decided not to pursue fraud charges at roughly the same time the news hit the internet.
At the Law Offices of Judy L. Burger, we will aggressively pursue the best outcome possible for you in your divorce or custody proceedings. Judy L. Burger is known for her tenacious representation of clients in high conflict cases in and around the San Francisco Bay and Sacramento areas. If you are a parent facing a divorce or custody dispute, call us today to learn more about how we can help. Call (415)293-8314 in the San Francisco Bay area or (916)631-1935 in the Sacramento area, or contact us online via our confidential inquiry form. 
In the much-publicized divorce of Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise, the tabloids found dozens of opportunities to photograph each parent out and about with their daughter Suri. It’s possible they were simply going about their daily lives while being hounded by the paparazzi, but it is just as likely the soon-to-be-divorced parents were trying to build their respective cases for custody.
When a marriage falls apart, the children of the relationship are caught in the middle. Parents often overlook the negative effect of their verbal sparring on the children. Courts, on the other hand, are not prone to overlook a parent’s bad behavior while the children are present.
Just as parents take measures to protect their children from negative outside influences, parents in the midst of a divorce have a duty to protect their children as much as possible. The children’s lives are going to change, but that doesn’t mean the children should be privy to all dirty laundry.
The details of a divorce should only be shared with children to the extent warranted by each child’s mental and emotional maturity level, and never in a manner reasonably expected to cause the child to harbor ill will for the other parent.
In our experience, children are flexible, adaptable, and perceptive. They may appear to be largely unaffected by your divorce, when in fact they have many questions they are simply afraid to ask. Counseling is often recommended after a divorce to help children process the break up of their parents and learn to deal with their conflicting emotions in a healthy way.
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Changing a child support or visitation order is a common issue in family law. Usually driven by a change in the life of one of the parents, there are basically two ways to go about making these changes.
If the parents can agree to the changes without going to court, you can file your agreement with the help of an attorney. If you are agreeing to change child support, the attorney will help you file a Stipulation to Modify Child Support and Order. To make changes to visitation or custody they will assist you with filing a Stipulation for Custody and/or Visitation of Children.
If you and the other parent can’t reach an agreement, you will need to take the other parent back to court. Since the court will consider many factors before making a decision, you should speak to a qualified California family law attorney before filing any documents with the court. Your attorney will know which factors should be highlighted to give you the best chance of successfully getting your child support or custody order modified.
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It is not unusual for couples seeking a divorce to be unable to reach an agreement on various issues, such as child custody to the division of assets and liabilities. While one spouse may have no interest in compromising on a particular issue, the other spouse may be anxious to move on. In some cases, it may be appropriate to ask the court for a “bifurcation” of marital status. What this means is that the court will address the issue of your marital status while postponing resolution of the remaining issues.
Though bifurcation is possible, it is rare. Courts are reluctant to bifurcate divorce cases for two reasons. First, they generally prefer to handle each case as a whole. California courts are heavily burdened as it is, and splitting one case into two inevitably creates more work.
The second reason courts are reluctant to bifurcate divorce cases is that once a marriage has been dissolved, one or both parties may lose motivation to work out the other issues.
Nonetheless, bifurcation is granted in rare circumstances, such as when a spouse is expecting a child conceived outside the existing marriage. In that situation, bifurcation may lead to a quicker judgment of divorce, allowing the expectant mother or father to marry the other parent prior to the child’s birth.
If bifurcation is appropriate in your situation, seek the help of an experienced California divorce lawyer.
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We spend a good amount of time here talking about getting divorced in California, so it seems only fair to turn our attention for a few moments to how to get married in California in the first place.
In order to get married in California, you must first obtain a marriage license. You do not have to be resident of California to obtain a marriage license, but California has a few unique laws and regulations which will require a few decisions on your part before going to get a license.
For example, you may decide that you would like a confidential marriage license. Or, you may decide you would rather a friend or relative perform the marriage ceremony by participating in the Deputy for a Day program. You will also need to decide what names each of you will use are your married names.
Marriage licenses are issued by the Clerk’s office, which will require a picture ID and possibly a certified birth certificate. You will also need to know the city and state where your parents were born and each of their full names, including your mother’s maiden name.
If you were previously married, then you should be prepared to present proof of divorce, death, or annulment when you apply for a marriage license. If you were granted a divorce within the last 90 days before applying for a marriage license, then you will need to provide a copy of your final divorce decree.
These are some of the technical requirements for getting a marriage license. Of course, we will add that premarital counseling with a qualified family law attorney and perhaps an estate planner are always recommended, especially if you have or expect to have assets you want to protect in the event of a future divorce.
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There is more to getting married than just showing up at the church. If you live in California and are thinking about getting married, be sure to check the requirements. Marriage laws vary by state, so don’t wait until the last minute to make sure you are ready.
Many clients ask us what they can expect in mediation and we are careful to explain the ins and outs and the mechanics of the mediation process. Mediation can be a very positive experience for those who are of a mind to compromise and who are fortunate to have the help of a truly unbiased and experienced mediator. Knowing the basics ahead of time often helps alleviate our clients’ anxiety.
The basic idea behind mediation is that the two parties, along with their attorneys, sit down with a neutral third party and attempt to reach an agreement on various issues in a divorce. The discussions that take place during mediation are kept confidential and are prohibited from being used if the matter eventually winds up in court. This arrangement is intended to allow for the worry-free sharing of ideas and offers.
One fact worth taking to heart is that mediators are referred to as neutrals because that is the essence of their role – to maintain complete neutrality regardless of the facts of a case. Maintaining neutrality can be a challenge when facts weigh heavily in favor of one party, but neutrality is absolutely essential. If one spouse perceives a lack of absolute neutrality, the mediation is unlikely to be successful.
Another fact to remember is that mediation can only result in an agreement when both parties engage in mediation with a good faith intent to be open minded and willing to compromise to find the middle ground in every disputed issue.
Being open minded and willing to compromise may sound reasonable enough, but often the problem is that by the time one or both spouses decide to file for divorce, good faith is long gone. A spouse who was the victim of neglect or deceit may not be able to forgive and forget. In our family law practice, we deal with highly contested cases where emotions are frequently too raw for a mediation to be successful.
If you are facing mediation, the