The answer is a troubling yes. While the holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, family togetherness, and celebration, for many individuals living with domestic violence, it represents a period of heightened danger and fear. Understanding this reality is critical for protecting vulnerable family members and knowing when and how to seek help.
The Statistics Tell a Sobering Story
Recent data confirms what domestic violence advocates have long observed: domestic violence spikes every year during the holidays. The numbers are significant and consistent across different regions.
- An IPV study based on data gathered between 2005 and 2017 showed that 15% of all domestic violence-related visits to emergency rooms occurred during holiday periods, with New Year’s Eve having the highest incident rate.
- San Antonio’s Metro Health reports domestic violence cases tend to rise by around 25% during the holidays. This trend isn’t isolated to one community. Police say several factors contribute to the increase in domestic violence during the holidays, including financial stress, alcohol and drugs, holiday shopping pressures, and family dynamics.
- A 2024 report, “The Costs of Intimate Partner Violence in California,” reveals a cost of $73.7 billion to the state in health care, lost productivity and income, and criminal justice and response program spending for domestic violence cases in 2022 alone. This is about 2% of California’s gross domestic product.
The pattern extends beyond just major winter holidays. Stress elevates, finances usually take a hit, alcohol and drug use tend to increase, and people are at home more with their family during various holiday periods throughout the year, creating multiple windows of increased risk.
Why Does Domestic Violence Increase During Holidays?
Several key elements create what some advocates call a “perfect storm” of risk factors.
Financial Stress and Economic Pressure
The expectation to buy gifts, host gatherings, and create picture-perfect celebrations places enormous financial strain on households. Financial stress is one of the most significant contributors to the rise in domestic violence during the holidays, as the pressure to buy gifts, host gatherings, and meet societal expectations can strain household budgets, often exacerbating existing tensions within relationships.
Increased Alcohol and Substance Use
The holiday season is often accompanied by increased alcohol consumption, which is a well-known risk factor for domestic violence, as alcohol can impair judgment and lower inhibitions, making it easier for underlying tensions to erupt into physical confrontations. Holiday parties and social gatherings often normalize excessive drinking, providing abusers with both opportunity and excuse for violent behavior.
Heightened Emotional Expectations
The cultural pressure to be happy, grateful, and family-oriented during the holidays creates additional stress for those in troubled relationships. The holidays can be emotionally taxing, as the expectation to maintain a cheerful demeanor, coupled with the stress of family interactions, can lead to heightened emotions, and for those already in volatile relationships, these emotional triggers can escalate conflicts into physical violence.
Increased Time Together and Isolation
With families spending extended time together, such as spouses or parents with school-age children back at home on a school break, the chances of violence within a household increase. Additionally, during the holidays, many support services like shelters and hotlines may have reduced hours or may be understaffed, making it more challenging for victims to seek help or escape abusive situations.
Control and Power Dynamics
While there are several factors that can fuel domestic violence during the holidays, the root cause usually involves one family member exerting control over another. The holidays provide abusers with additional opportunities to isolate victims from support systems, control finances, and manipulate family dynamics.
The Hidden Reality: The Honeymoon Phase
Interestingly, domestic violence shelters report a complex pattern during the holidays. Shelters actually see short dips this time of year, when survivors try to go back home, as the honeymoon phase kicks in with abusers saying, ‘I love you, I’m sorry, it’s the holidays. This cycle makes the holiday period particularly dangerous, as victims may return to unsafe situations hoping for change that rarely materializes.
How Judy Burger Can Help
If you’re experiencing domestic violence, taking legal action can be a critical step toward safety and protection. As a California Certified Family Law Specialist, Judy L. Burger has dedicated her practice to helping victims of domestic violence obtain the legal protection they need. This certification, held by fewer than 10% of California family law attorneys, reflects advanced knowledge and proven experience in family law matters, including domestic violence cases.
Judy can help you obtain a domestic violence restraining order, which can provide multiple layers of protection. In California, these orders can require the abuser to stay away from you, your home, your workplace, and your children’s schools. They can also address child custody and visitation, require the abuser to move out of a shared residence, and prohibit the abuser from possessing firearms.
The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger understands the urgency of domestic violence situations. Judy and her team can guide you through the process of obtaining emergency protective orders, temporary restraining orders, and permanent restraining orders. They can also help you navigate related family law matters, including divorce, child custody, and property division, when domestic violence is a factor.
Beyond restraining orders, Judy can provide comprehensive legal representation if you’re going through a divorce involving domestic violence. She understands how abuse affects custody determinations, spousal support calculations, and property division. Her approach prioritizes your safety and your children’s safety while protecting your legal rights and financial interests.
Recognizing the Signs and Taking Action
Domestic violence takes many forms beyond physical abuse. In California, abuse can be emotional, psychological, verbal, or physical. It can include controlling access to money, isolating someone from friends and family, or engaging in coercive control that interferes with a person’s free will and personal liberty.
If you’re in immediate danger, always call 911 first. Once you’re safe, contacting an attorney who understands domestic violence can help you create a comprehensive safety plan and obtain legal protection.
The time when leaving or planning to leave an abusive relationship can be the most dangerous. Having a skilled attorney on your side ensures you understand your options, have proper legal documentation, and take steps that protect both your immediate safety and your long-term interests.
Holiday Domestic Violence FAQs
Can I get a restraining order during the holidays, even when courts are closed?
Yes. Law enforcement officers can request emergency protective orders from judges 24 hours a day, including holidays and weekends. These emergency orders last 5-7 days and go into effect immediately, giving you time to seek a longer-term domestic violence restraining order from the court when it reopens.
Does a domestic violence restraining order affect child custody during the holidays?
Yes. A domestic violence restraining order can include temporary custody and visitation orders that remain in effect during the holidays. The court prioritizes the safety of children when domestic violence is present, and holiday visitation schedules can be modified or supervised to ensure protection.
What if my abuser promises to change and wants me to drop the restraining order for the holidays?
You should never feel pressured to drop legal protection. The “honeymoon phase,” where abusers apologize and promise change, is a well-documented part of the cycle of violence. Consult with your attorney before making any decisions about modifying or dismissing a restraining order, regardless of promises made.
Can financial stress during the holidays be used as a defense for domestic violence?
No. While financial stress may be a contributing factor to increased tension, it is never an excuse or legal defense for domestic violence. California law protects victims regardless of the circumstances that may have contributed to the abuser’s behavior. Everyone has the right to live free from violence and abuse.
Is there a cost to file for a domestic violence restraining order in California?
No. There is no filing fee to request a domestic violence restraining order in California. The court process is designed to be accessible to all victims of domestic violence, regardless of their financial situation. Additionally, if your restraining order is granted, the court can order the abuser to pay your attorney’s fees and costs.
Take Action to Protect Yourself and Your Family
The holidays should be a time of safety, peace, and genuine celebration—not fear and danger. If you or someone you care about is experiencing domestic violence, especially during this high-risk holiday season, don’t wait to seek help.
The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger is here to provide the legal guidance and protection you need. With offices throughout California and a deep commitment to helping victims of domestic violence, Judy Burger and her team understand the courage it takes to seek help and the urgency of your situation.
Don’t let another holiday season pass in fear. Call The Law Offices of Judy L. Burger now and learn about your legal options for protection. Your safety and your children’s safety are too important to wait. Reach out today—we’re ready to help you reclaim your life and build a safer tomorrow.
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For confidential support, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.